The Best Man's Guide To Wedding Support

Being the best man at a wedding is a big deal and often comes with a lot of responsibilities. It is customary for the groom to give a gift to the best man as a token of appreciation for their involvement in the wedding. But how much should the groom spend on this gift?

There is no one-size-fits-all answer to this question, as it depends on various factors, such as the groom's budget, the relationship between the groom and the best man, and the expenses incurred by the best man for the wedding. Some people suggest spending between $30 and $100 on the best man's gift, while others recommend spending a percentage of what the best man spent on wedding-related expenses, such as attire, travel, and the bachelor party. Ultimately, the most important thing is to choose a thoughtful gift that shows appreciation, regardless of the price tag.

Gifting money to the groom

Budget and Financial Situation

It is essential to consider your budget and financial situation when deciding how much money to gift. While you may want to give a generous amount, it is important to stay within your means. Remember that it is the thought that counts, and a heartfelt gift does not have to be expensive. According to some sources, the standard rate for a gift from the best man is around $100, while others suggest $150, and others still suggest $300. It is up to you to decide what you are comfortable with and what you think is appropriate given your relationship and financial situation.

Wedding-Related Expenses

When deciding how much money to gift, consider the other wedding-related expenses you have incurred. If you have spent a significant amount on a tux rental, travel, accommodation, and the bachelor party, it may not be feasible to give a large monetary gift as well. In this case, a smaller gift or a thoughtful token of your friendship may be more appropriate. Some people suggest that a safe equation is to buy a gift that costs 20-25% of what your groomsmen spent on the wedding.

Cultural and Regional Differences

It is worth noting that the amount you gift may vary depending on your cultural background and region. For example, in some cultures, it is customary to pin money to the bride and groom's clothing, while in others, guests may give expensive gold jewellery. If you are unsure, it may be helpful to ask other friends who have recently gotten married or to consider the cultural background of the bride and groom.

Personalisation and Sentiment

When deciding how much money to gift, consider adding a personal touch to show your appreciation. You could include a handwritten note expressing your gratitude and sharing memories of your friendship. You could also consider a small token or trinket that symbolises your friendship or a shared memory. A personalised gift, such as a money clip or wallet with their initials, can also be a thoughtful way to show your appreciation.

Timing

It is generally recommended to give the gift before the wedding, such as at the rehearsal dinner or bachelor party. However, if this is not possible, the groom can present the gift on the wedding day before the ceremony. It is also important not to wait until the last minute to decide on a gift, as this may lead to rushed decisions and generic gifts.

In conclusion, gifting money to the groom as his best man is a thoughtful gesture, but the amount you give will depend on various factors, including your budget, cultural background, and the nature of your relationship. Remember to add a personal touch and to give the gift in a timely manner.

Paying for wedding attire

The best man will typically be expected to pay for their wedding outfit. However, there is some debate over whether the groom or the best man should pay for the wedding attire. Some sources state that the groom should pay for the attire, especially if the best man is facing financial difficulties or if the suit is particularly expensive. However, other sources claim that it is customary for the best man to pay for their own suit.

The cost of a suit can vary depending on the quality and brand. A good quality suit can cost around $500, but it is possible to find cheaper options, with suits available for as little as $200. Shoes can also be purchased on a budget, with decent options available for around $50.

If the wedding has a specific dress code or theme, the best man may need to purchase additional accessories such as ties, socks, cufflinks, and pocket squares. These accessories can add to the overall cost of the outfit.

It is important to discuss expectations and budget with the groom before agreeing to be the best man to ensure that everyone is on the same page regarding financial responsibilities.

In addition to the wedding attire, the best man may also need to budget for travel and accommodation expenses, especially if the wedding is taking place in a different city or country. These costs can quickly add up, so it is essential to plan and prepare accordingly.

Bachelor party planning and expenses

The groom's best man or his closest friends traditionally plan the bachelor party. The groom can also choose to plan his own pre-wedding celebration. The bachelor party usually takes place one to three months before the wedding. It is advisable to start planning at least three to six months in advance, especially if the itinerary is elaborate.

The average cost of a bachelor party is $1,500 per person, a $440 increase since 2019. This cost varies depending on the length of the party and the location. For example, a bachelor party lasting one to two days costs an average of $1,300 per person, while those lasting three to four days cost $1,650 per person. If guests need to fly to the party destination, the average cost is $2,000 per attendee, whereas if they can drive, the cost is around $1,000 per person.

Bachelor parties tend to be more expensive than bachelorette parties as they often take place in major cities like Las Vegas, Los Angeles, or New York City, and attendees are more likely to stay in hotels.

• Lodging: Guests usually pay for their own accommodation. If renting a house, the best man should ensure everyone is comfortable with the cost and room assignments.
• Food and entertainment: This depends on the event. For casual meals, it is easier to split the bill. For more formal dining, the group may choose to pay for the groom. Any additional entertainment, such as a show, paintball, or strippers, is usually covered by the groom.
• Transportation to the party: Guests typically pay for their own transportation to the bachelor party destination.
• Transportation during the party: The groom usually covers this as a "thanks for coming" and "safe travel" gift to the guests.
• Props and giveaways: The best man usually pays for decor and branded items, often with help from the wedding party.

It is also worth noting that the groom's parents sometimes contribute by paying for a meal, part of the accommodation, or an activity.

Wedding gift for the couple

The amount spent on a wedding gift often depends on a variety of factors, including your budget, your relationship with the couple, and the cost of attending the wedding. Here are some guidelines and suggestions for how much to spend on a wedding gift as the best man.

• According to Zola, the average person spends $50 to $100 on a wedding gift. This amount can be adjusted based on your relationship with the couple and your budget.
• For coworkers or distant relatives, $50 to $75 is generally considered appropriate.
• Friends, relatives, or more distant acquaintances are suggested to spend $75 to $100.
• Close friends, family members, or wedding party members are expected to spend $100 to $150 or more.
• If your budget is tight, consider a group gift or a gift card to one of the stores where the couple has registered.
• If you are very close to the couple or are in a position to do so, you may want to give more than the suggested amount.
• If you are attending with a plus-one, it is customary to give a more expensive gift, but this is not a requirement.
• If you have already spent a significant amount on pre-wedding activities, attire, or other wedding-related expenses, you may want to give a more sentimental gift or contribute to a honeymoon fund.
• If you are unable to attend the wedding, it is still considerate to send a small gift or card. A gift in the range of $50 to $100 is generally appropriate in this case.
• In the case of a destination wedding, it is also considerate to give a gift to help the couple celebrate, even if you are already bearing the costs of travel and accommodation.

Travel and accommodation expenses

As a best man, you may be expected to pay for your travel and accommodation expenses. This can include transportation and hotel costs. If you are attending other pre-wedding events, such as an engagement party, you will also need to budget for the travel costs associated with these celebrations.

To save money on travel expenses, you could consider sharing a vacation home rental or hotel room with other members of the wedding party.

The cost of travel and accommodation will depend on the location of the wedding and the duration of your stay. It is a good idea to discuss your budget and expectations with the groom and other groomsmen in advance to ensure everyone is on the same page.

In addition to travel and accommodation, other expenses you may incur as a best man include the cost of the bachelor party, wedding attire, accessories, and a wedding gift for the couple.

Frequently asked questions