Franklin Dean
Jewish weddings in Biblical times were a time of celebration, with feasting, music, and dancing lasting up to seven days. The wedding ceremony itself, including the betrothal, was a significant event, marking the beginning of a new life together. The father of the groom would choose a bride and negotiate the bride price with her father. The betrothal ceremony included a symbolic sealing of the marriage by drinking wine, and the couple was considered married, though they did not yet live together or consummate the marriage. The actual wedding ceremony, or chupa, is a solemn event that concludes with the breaking of the glass and is followed by a celebratory meal and more festivities.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Duration | 3 to 6 hours, or even more |
| Wedding feast | 7 days |
| Bride price | 50 shekels of silver |
| Bride's estate inventory | Cash, property, livestock, businesses |
| Marriage contract | Ketubah |
| Wedding ceremony | Kiddushin (betrothal) and nissuin (marriage) |
| Wedding canopy | Chuppah or huppah |
| Wedding rings | Exchanged under the canopy |
| Glass | Broken during the ceremony |
| Dance | Horah (circle dance) |
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What You'll Learn
The wedding feast (seudah)
In ancient times, the wedding feast, or seudah, was a significant part of Jewish weddings. It was a time of celebration and joy, lasting up to seven days (as seen in Judges 14:10-12 and John 2). The feast included abundant food, music, dancing, and other festivities. This tradition still holds strong among Orthodox Jews, who celebrate the union of the bride and groom for seven nights, hosting grand meals with friends and family.
The wedding feast was the third stage of a Jewish wedding, following the signing of the ketubah (marriage contract) and the chuppah (sexual consummation). The ketubah, signed by the bride, groom, and their fathers, sealed the marriage. However, the couple refrained from sexual consummation until the groom fulfilled his financial obligations to the bride's father, as outlined in the contract. This delay could last for years, as seen in the biblical story of Jacob and Rachel.
During the wedding feast, the bride and groom were finally united and celebrated their marriage. The feast was held at the groom's house, and the bride was ceremonially brought to his home, as seen in the parable of the ten virgins (Matthew 25:1). The groom's friends played a crucial role, escorting the bride to the nuptial chamber and waiting outside to certify the consummation to the wedding guests, as mentioned in John 3:29.
The wedding feast was a time of great joy and merriment, with music, dancing, and an abundance of food and wine. It was a period for the newlyweds to celebrate their union with their loved ones and mark the beginning of their life together. The seven-day duration of the feast symbolized the significance of the marriage covenant and the new bond formed between two families.
Today, while most Jewish weddings are followed by a wedding supper and reception, the seudah, with its seven days of celebration, remains a cherished tradition among Orthodox Jews, preserving the ancient customs and the spirit of joy that surrounds a wedding.
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The wedding contract (ketubah)
In the Bible, the term "wedding contract" refers to the "ketubah", which is a Jewish marriage contract that couples sign before their wedding. The ketubah outlines the groom's financial and conjugal responsibilities to the bride, as well as what should happen in the event of a divorce or untimely death. It also lists details of the wedding, such as the date, the names of the to-be-weds, and more.
The ketubah is derived from the biblical "mohar", which was the price paid by the groom to the bride or her parents for the marriage. The ketubah served as a contract, whereby the amount due to the wife (the bride price) would be paid in the event of the cessation of marriage, either by the death of the husband or divorce. This was to protect the wife and ensure her financial well-being. The ketubah also replaced the need for a bride price, which created a social problem as many young prospective husbands could not afford it.
The signing of the ketubah is a longstanding tradition that has been an essential part of Jewish weddings for more than 2,000 years. It is considered a sacred ritual and is usually done shortly before the wedding ceremony. The ketubah is signed by two witnesses and is traditionally read out loud under the "chuppah" between the "erusin" and "nissuin". The "nissuin" refers to the final step in the Jewish wedding tradition, which comes after the wedding feast or "seudah".
In modern times, the text of the ketubah remains the same in Orthodox communities, but other communities have adopted different versions. For example, some couples choose to write their own ketubah or purchase one with words that better suit their relationship. Additionally, different denominations have their own set of rules for the ketubah, so it is important to check with a rabbi or officiant about the specific requirements.
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The bride price
In Bible times, Jewish weddings were significant events that often lasted for a week or more. One unique aspect of these ancient weddings was the concept of the "bride price," which played a crucial role in the marriage process.
The amount of the bride price could vary, but it typically consisted of money, property, or other valuable goods. In some cases, it could be symbolic, representing the groom's willingness to provide for his future wife and signifying his ability to support a family. Paying the bride price demonstrated the groom's commitment and seriousness about the marriage. It also served as a form of protection for the bride, ensuring that she would be provided for in the event of divorce or widowhood.
The negotiation of the bride price was usually done between the groom and the father of the bride, sometimes with the input of family elders or community leaders. Once the amount was agreed upon, it would be publicly announced, often during the betrothal period, which preceded the actual wedding ceremony. During this betrothal period, which could last for up to a year, the couple was considered legally married, but they did not yet live together or consummate the marriage.
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Symbolic ceremonies
Jewish weddings are rich in symbolism, with many rituals and objects holding deeper meanings. One of the most well-known symbolic Jewish wedding traditions is the chuppah, or wedding canopy. The chuppah represents the new home being built by the couple, symbolising shelter, privacy, and intimacy. It is typically made of a cloth canopy held up by four beams, creating a sacred space for the ceremony. The chuppah is often placed outdoors under an open sky, symbolising the couple's willingness to welcome family and friends into their new home.
Another symbolic element of Jewish weddings is the breaking of the glass. While there are various interpretations, it is generally seen as a reminder of the fragility of human relationships and the life-changing nature of marriage. The breaking of the glass also serves as a reminder of the destruction of the Temple in Jerusalem. This ritual is followed by the joyous shout of "Mazel Tov!", which means "good fortune", wishing the new couple happiness and prosperity.
The exchange of rings is another significant part of Jewish wedding ceremonies. According to Jewish law, the ring is typically made of solid gold or silver, free of any embellishments, to represent the purity and honesty of the relationship. The groom gives the bride the ring, reciting a declaration that consecrates their union according to the law of Moses and Israel.
The ketubah, or marriage contract, is also an important symbolic document in Jewish weddings. It outlines the groom's commitments and obligations to the bride, including providing food, clothing, and marital relations. The ketubah is signed by two witnesses and often beautifully designed, taking its place as a piece of artwork in the couple's home.
Additionally, the circling ritual holds symbolic significance in traditional Jewish weddings. The bride circles the groom seven times, symbolising the building of a wall of love and protection around their relationship. This custom has also been reinterpreted in modern times to represent the centrality of one spouse to the other or to honour the matriarchs and patriarchs of Judaism.
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Dancing
In medieval times, Jewish communities in France, Germany, and Poland had a wedding-house or Tanzhaus for festive occasions. A Tanzfuehrer (dance leader or caller) would be aided by hired musicians. During the Renaissance, Jews danced for recreation and entertainment, and there were Jewish dancing teachers in Renaissance Italy.
In the 18th century, with the rise of Hasidism in Eastern Europe, dance became a way to attain religious enthusiasm and express devotion to God. Hasidic dance assumed the form of a circle, with dancers starting at a slow tempo and gradually increasing the pace until they were leaping in the air in an attempt to reach spiritual ecstasy.
In modern times, the Mitzvah tantz is a dance performed at Jewish weddings, in which family members and honoured rabbis are invited to dance in front of the bride, sometimes with her if they are a father or grandfather. They may hold a gartel, a type of belt, and then dance with the groom. At the end, the bride and groom dance together.
In traditional weddings, the bride and groom would circle each other seven times, symbolising perfection and completeness. This has been reinterpreted in liberal or progressive Jewish communities to signify the centrality of one spouse to the other or to represent the matriarchs and patriarchs.
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Frequently asked questions
Jewish weddings in Biblical times were followed by a wedding feast that could last seven days.
The Chupa is the Jewish wedding ceremony, which usually takes place outside and lasts 20-60 minutes.
The Yichud is the time for the couple to break their fast and have their first meal together.
The Chabad community is a Jewish community where weddings can last between 3 and 6 hours.
The Kabbalas Panim is one of the four main parts of a Chabad wedding.
