Spanish Weddings: Traditions, Rituals, And Unique Customs

how are spanish wedding different than the united states

Weddings are a special occasion that brings together families, friends, and traditions to celebrate the union of two people. Wedding traditions vary across cultures, and Spanish weddings have distinct customs and rituals that set them apart from weddings in the United States. From the length of the celebration to the attire and gift-giving traditions, Spanish weddings offer a unique experience steeped in cultural significance.

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Dress code and attire

While weddings in the United States tend to have no dress code, Spanish weddings are quite the opposite. There are specific rules for attire, and Spanish weddings are never casual. It is important to dress formally, with men typically wearing a two-piece suit and women wearing a nice dress, jumpsuit, or trouser suit.

For day weddings, women usually wear cocktail-length dresses, skirts, or trouser suits, and men may wear a morning suit. Fascinators or pamelas (broad-brimmed sun hats) are also worn to day weddings, with fascinators being acceptable for evening weddings too. If the wedding is in a church, women should cover their shoulders with a bolero or shawl during the ceremony.

For evening weddings, women wear long dresses and men wear suits. It is customary for women to wear long dresses in the fall and winter, and bright colours and floral prints are popular in spring and summer. It is also important to note that, in Spain, it is common for all female guests to get their hair and makeup done professionally, and to have manicures and pedicures.

It is considered rude to wear white to a wedding, as this is the colour the bride will wear. Black is also not commonly worn by women when attending a wedding, although it is not forbidden.

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Timing and structure

Spanish weddings differ from those in the United States in several ways, particularly when it comes to timing and structure.

Timing

In the United States, daytime weddings are more common, adding a romantic glow to the festivities. The reception is the heart of the celebration, with exquisite main courses and a cocktail hour for guests to mingle before the festivities begin. In contrast, Spanish weddings traditionally take place at night, often lasting until the early morning. While Spanish weddings may start in the morning or afternoon, they always end very late.

Structure

Spanish weddings traditionally follow the Catholic tradition, with at least 200 guests in attendance. However, many couples today opt for a civil ceremony followed by a small reception with family and close friends. In the United States, weddings typically begin with a bridal procession, including flower girls and ring bearers, followed by the couple and their parents. The bride's father, or both parents, escort her to the altar.

At Spanish weddings, there are no bridesmaids or groomsmen, and therefore no Maid of Honor or Best Man. Instead, there are padrinos, usually the father of the bride and the mother of the groom, who act as witnesses to the marriage. The head table is set for six: the newlyweds and their parents, creating an intimate setting. During the reception, guests traditionally go up to the head table to give the couple a gift as a thank you for the invitation.

Spanish weddings often include unique traditions such as the sharing of 13 unity coins, symbolizing the couple's commitment to sharing their goods and good fortune in their future together. Another tradition is the lasso ceremony, where a long lazo is wrapped around the couple in the form of an infinity symbol, symbolizing their unity. In the United States, weddings may incorporate various rituals, such as candle lighting, tying rituals, or passing a glass of wine to symbolize unity and love.

Wedding Favors: To Gift or Not to Gift?

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Food and drink

United States

In the United States, the reception is the heart of the celebration, with exquisite main courses marking the high point of the festivities. The cocktail hour is a vibrant prelude to the reception, where guests can enjoy drinks and canapes before the main event.

Spain

Spanish weddings are known for their lavish spreads of food and free-flowing drinks. The food is typically served late, starting around 10 pm, and consists of multiple courses, including appetizers, starters, main courses, sorbet, and cake. The meals can range from informal buffets to three- or four-course meals, with an emphasis on local specialties and elaborate presentations. Tapas, cheese, ham, and other typical dishes from the region are often served as appetizers. Cava, Sangria, beer, and wine are commonly included with the dinner, and it is customary to have an open bar with additional beverage options.

Spanish wedding cakes are typically not multi-layered like their American counterparts. Instead, they are often simple themed cakes that are cut with a special sword called an "Espada," an old Roman tradition.

Another unique aspect of Spanish weddings is the presence of wedding cookies, which signify the sweetness and richness of life. These cookies are either enjoyed during the event or given to guests as favors.

While Spanish weddings can vary depending on region, religion, and resources, they are generally known for their generous portions and late-night dining, creating a unique and memorable culinary experience for guests.

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Gifts and money

In the United States, there is usually no stipulated gift or specific monetary amount given to the newlyweds. In Spain, however, weddings are a significant source of monetary gifts for the couple. It is customary for the groom's friends to cut up his tie and sell the pieces to the guests, while the bride's friends do the same with her wedding garter. This money is used to set up their new home together.

Another Spanish wedding tradition is the "money dance", where guests pin money on the bride or groom for a chance to dance with them. The amount of money pinned determines how many songs the guest gets to dance to with the newlyweds.

At Catholic weddings in Spain, the couple also receives 13 coins known as 'arras' or 'wedding coins'. Twelve of these are gold, and one is platinum. They are presented during the ceremony and symbolize good fortune and financial prosperity for the couple.

In addition to monetary gifts, Spanish weddings also include gifts of manicures and pedicures for the bride and her female guests.

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Traditions and rituals

Spanish weddings are steeped in tradition and culture, and while some traditions have changed over time, many remain. One of the most well-known Spanish wedding traditions is the sharing of 13 coins, known as arras or unity coins, between the bride and groom. This tradition, common at Catholic weddings, symbolises the couple's commitment to sharing their lives and goods together and represents Jesus and his twelve apostles. The groom presents the coins to the bride, demonstrating his promise to provide for her during their marriage.

Another unique aspect of Spanish weddings is the absence of bridesmaids and groomsmen. Instead, the couple is accompanied by padrinos, usually the father of the bride and the mother of the groom. These special figures act as witnesses to the marriage and provide guidance to the newlyweds. At the reception, the head table is traditionally set for six: the bride, groom, and their parents, creating an intimate setting for emotional moments.

In terms of attire, Spanish brides traditionally wear intricate lace black dresses and veils, known as mantillas, symbolising their commitment "until death do us part". However, modern brides may opt for a black dress as a nod to tradition while adding their twist. In contrast, American brides typically wear white gowns, though they often change into something shorter and more comfortable during the reception.

Spanish weddings are known for their extravagance and late-night celebrations. It is customary for Spanish couples to have an open bar and for guests to receive gifts as a thank you for attending. A unique tradition is the money dance, where guests pin money on the newlyweds for a chance to dance with them. This money is believed to bring good fortune and help the couple set up their new life together.

Hispanic wedding traditions vary across countries, with each adding its distinctive twist. One Mexican tradition is the lasso ceremony, where a large lazo, or lasso, is wrapped around the couple in the shape of an eight, symbolising their unity. Another fun Mexican custom is la serenata, adding a musical element to the festivities.

Frequently asked questions

Spanish weddings are steeped in tradition and usually follow the Catholic religion. They tend to take place at night and include a head table for six people, including the newlyweds and their parents. In contrast, US weddings usually take place during the day and centre around the reception, where the party comes alive.

Spanish weddings have unique traditions such as the sharing of 13 coins, or arras, between the newlyweds, which represent good fortune and financial prosperity. Another tradition is the lasso ceremony, where a lazo godparent or family member wraps a long lazo (lasso) around the couple in the shape of an eight, symbolising their unity.

US weddings often include a bridal procession, with the bride's father or both parents escorting her to the altar. The reception is also a key part of the celebration, with exquisite main courses and a cocktail hour for guests to mingle. Another charming custom is throwing rose petals at the newlyweds, symbolising happiness and fertility.

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