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The wedding ceremony is a special occasion that marks the beginning of a new chapter in a couple's life. One of the most important traditions is the exchange of rings, which symbolises love and devotion. While the groom typically puts the ring on first, modern couples may choose to have the bride do so to symbolise equality. In some traditions, the groom's ring becomes a wedding ring during the ceremony, and occasionally, the groom receives a separate wedding ring. In other cases, the couple may reuse their engagement rings as wedding rings.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Does the groom need a ring? | In some cultures, yes. In others, it is not customary. |
| Who puts the ring on first? | Traditionally, the groom puts the ring on first. However, modern couples may choose to have the bride put the ring on first as a symbol of equality. |
| What type of ring does the groom receive? | In some cultures, the groom receives a plain band, while in others, he may receive a bejeweled ring. |
| When does the groom receive the ring? | The groom typically receives the ring during the wedding ceremony, either from the bride or as part of the exchange of rings with the best man or maid of honor. |
| Where does the groom wear the ring? | The groom usually wears the ring on his left hand, but in some cultures, it is worn on the right hand. |
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What You'll Learn
Wedding ring traditions
Wedding rings have been exchanged as part of marriage ceremonies for a long time—as far back as the BC era. Anecdotal credit for starting the wedding ring tradition has been given to various ancient groups, including the ancient Egyptians, who are said to have invented the engagement ring using braided hemp, reed, or hair. The ancient Greeks adopted this tradition, using materials like bone or ivory. However, reliable data traces the origin of wedding rings back to ancient Rome, where the ring was used as a tangible symbol of a business contract. It signified the handing over of control of household goods and was an outward sign that a person was betrothed.
In the 12th century, the Christian church established the wedding ceremony and gave the wedding band meaning. This was perhaps how the tradition of an engagement ring and a separate wedding band came to be. At the now sacramental ceremony, the groom would give the bride a second, church-sanctioned band. The exchange was one-sided—with the bride receiving a ring from the groom—until very recently. The tradition of men wearing wedding bands became popular during World War II, as a reminder for soldiers overseas of their love at home.
Today, wedding bands are traditionally exchanged during the ceremony, with the bride and groom giving and receiving rings. In several traditions, the best man or maid of honour has the duty of keeping track of the couple's wedding rings and producing them at the symbolic moment of the exchange. In more elaborate weddings, a ring bearer, often a young family member, may assist in the ceremonial parading of the rings into the ceremony, sometimes on a special cushion.
The wedding band is typically simpler and less expensive than the engagement ring, consisting of a plain metal band that may include small accent diamonds. The engagement ring is usually more intricately designed, featuring a large central diamond or gemstone. In some cultures, the bride purchases the groom's wedding ring, while the groom pays for the bride's wedding ring.
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Engagement ring placement
While there is no universal rule for wedding jewellery placement, there are several traditions and modern approaches to wearing engagement and wedding rings together.
The engagement ring is typically worn on the fourth finger of the left hand, also known as the ring finger. This is true for most cultures, including Western societies. However, in some cultures, such as Eastern European, Northern European, and certain Asian countries, it is customary to wear the engagement ring on the fourth finger of the right hand.
On the wedding day, some brides choose to wear their engagement ring on their right hand to allow the groom to easily slip the wedding band on the left ring finger. This avoids any interruption during the ring exchange in the ceremony. Alternatively, the bride can keep her engagement ring on her left hand, and the groom will place the wedding band above it. After the ceremony, the bride can then rearrange the order of the rings, with the wedding band closest to the heart.
Some brides also choose to have someone hold their engagement ring during the ceremony, such as a bridesmaid or maid of honour, and then put it back on after receiving the wedding band.
Traditionally, the wedding band is placed first on the ring finger, followed by the engagement ring. This arrangement symbolises the wedding band's representation of marriage vows, positioned nearest to the heart, while the engagement ring acts as a protective guard for the marriage bond. However, some couples choose alternative arrangements based on comfort, ring design, aesthetics, or personal preference.
Ring Storage Before and During the Ceremony
Before the ceremony, it is essential to keep the rings in a secure location, such as with a wedding planner, in a safe at the venue, or with a trustworthy friend or family member. It is also advisable to decide in advance who will hold the rings during the ceremony and ensure that the wedding planner and officiant are aware of the plan.
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Who holds the groom's ring
Traditionally, the best man holds the groom's ring, but there are no strict rules. Modern weddings see couples choosing someone trustworthy who is special to them. Sometimes one person will hold both rings, but each partner may also choose one special person.
The best man is usually the one who holds the rings if there is no ring bearer. However, some couples choose to have the maid of honour hold one and the best man hold the other. The best man typically has pockets, so he is well-suited to holding the rings.
Some couples choose to surprise a family member who is not directly involved in the ceremony by asking them to hold the rings. For example, the rings could be placed under a family member's seat, such as one of the mothers of the couple, or given to the couple's parents, who will already be sitting at the front of the ceremony.
It is important to decide in advance who will hold the rings and who will bring them to the venue on the wedding day. This will help to ensure that the ceremony feels seamless.
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The best man's duties
While the groom's ring is a significant part of the wedding ceremony, the best man's duties extend beyond just handling the ring. Here are some of the key responsibilities that the best man typically assumes:
Planning and Organizing
The best man is usually in charge of planning and organizing the bachelor party, which includes figuring out logistics, offering recommendations, and collecting money from the groomsmen for any gifts or accommodations. He should enlist the help of the other groomsmen and ensure that the event aligns with the groom's interests and wishes.
Point of Contact and Support
The best man serves as the groom's right-hand man and go-to confidante, providing emotional support and being the groom's personal valet. He is the point of contact for everyone on the groom's side, including groomsmen and family members, and helps the groom with any day-of details or questions from the groomsmen.
Wedding Rehearsal and Ceremony
The best man is expected to attend the wedding rehearsal and rehearsal dinner. During the actual wedding ceremony, he traditionally walks down the aisle after the groom and stands closest to the groom at the altar. He may also be entrusted with holding the wedding rings, the groom's personal items, and ensuring that everyone is in the right place at the right time.
Witness and Reception Duties
After the ceremony, the best man signs the marriage license as a witness and hands the officiant their fee. He then transitions to the reception, where he should be the first one on the dance floor, mingling and dancing with the wedding party, the couple, and their families.
Post-Wedding Tasks
The best man may also be responsible for returning any rented attire and ensuring that all wedding items are safely with the couple or at the appropriate locations.
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History of wedding rings
The tradition of exchanging wedding rings is an ancient one, dating back 3,000 years. Wedding rings have been documented to be worn on every finger, even the thumb. Today, it is most commonly worn on the fourth finger of the left hand, also known as the "ring finger". This tradition is attributed to the Ancient Egyptians, who believed that this finger contained the "vena amoris" or "vein of love" that led directly to the heart. The Romans later adopted this belief and wore wedding rings on the same finger.
During the Middle Ages, wedding rings began to be adorned with precious gems. Medieval Europeans used rubies to symbolize passion, sapphires to symbolize the heavens, and diamonds to symbolize steadfast strength. The first recorded diamond wedding ring dates back to the late 1300s or early 1400s, as noted in the will of an English widow. The popularity of diamond rings increased in the 18th century, and by the 19th century, they had become a common choice for engagement rings.
In Europe during the 16th and 17th centuries, husbands bestowed a gimmel ring upon their wives. This ring consisted of two interlocking bands, with each partner wearing one band after their engagement. During the wedding ceremony, the two bands were reunited, and the bride wore the combined ring. Another historical custom of Europe is the fede ring, which features two hands clasped in betrothal. This ring style dates back to antiquity and was also popular during the Middle Ages.
In some European countries, such as Nordic countries, it is common to exchange plain engagement rings for both men and women, and then for the bride to receive a more ornate wedding ring during the ceremony. In Germany, Austria, and several Eastern European countries, the engagement and wedding rings are worn on the left hand, while the wedding ring is placed on the right hand during the nuptials.
The inclusion of rings in wedding ceremonies varies among different Christian denominations. While most Christian churches, such as Catholic, Lutheran, and Anglican, include the exchange of rings in their wedding liturgies, some denominations, such as certain Methodist churches, do not include ring ceremonies in their services.
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Frequently asked questions
While it is traditional for the groom to wear a ring at the wedding ceremony, it is ultimately a personal choice that should be made based on the couple's beliefs and values. In Germany, it has been customary for both the bride and groom to wear a wedding ring since at least the 1870s.
It is typically the best man's duty to hold the rings during the ceremony, but the rings can also be held by a trusted family member or friend.
In traditional wedding etiquette, the groom puts the wedding band on first, followed by the bride. However, many modern couples are choosing to have the bride put the ring on first as a symbol of equality in their relationship.
