Deborah Chan
The timing of wedding speeches is a key consideration for creating a seamless wedding reception. Traditionally, wedding speeches are made after the meal, concluding the day's formalities and allowing the wedding party to begin. However, modern weddings offer more flexibility, with speeches delivered before or during the meal to engage guests, manage speaker nerves, and provide entertainment between courses. Ultimately, the choice of timing depends on personal preferences, the comfort of the speakers, and logistical considerations such as catering and photography.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Traditional Order | Wedding speeches are usually done after the meal. |
| Pros of doing speeches after the meal | Guests are properly fed; Speakers can drink to boost their confidence; Guests have something to look forward to; Speakers may feel less pressure as part of a sequence; Guests have a talking point during the meal; Photographers can take a break during the meal; |
| Cons of doing speeches after the meal | Speakers may feel more nervous; Guests may be antsy to move around and mingle; Guests may need to use the bathroom or may have had a few drinks; Waiting staff may be collecting plates, causing distraction or noise; |
| Pros of doing speeches before the meal | Guests are fresh and attentive; Speakers can relax and enjoy the meal; Guests have something to talk about straight away; Speakers have less time to feel anticipation; Catering team and venue staff have more time; |
| Cons of doing speeches before the meal | Guests may still be finding their seats and chatting; Waiting staff may be serving food, causing noise and distraction; |
| Other Options | Some choose to do speeches midway through the meal, after the main course and before dessert; Speeches can also be split up between courses, providing bite-sized entertainment; |
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What You'll Learn
- Before the meal: Speakers can relax and enjoy the wedding breakfast
- After the meal: Guests are properly fed and speakers can drink to boost confidence
- During the meal: Provides bite-sized entertainment and helps speakers stick to timings
- Before guests are seated: Guests are fresh and attentive, and speakers grab their attention
- After guests are seated: Guests have something to talk about and speakers can relax knowing it's done
Before the meal: Speakers can relax and enjoy the wedding breakfast
There are several advantages to having wedding speeches before the meal. Firstly, it grabs the guests' attention instantly and avoids small talk at the table. It also gives guests something to talk about straight away, rather than repeating how lucky the couple are with the weather, for example. For nervous speakers, it means the anticipation of their speech is shorter, and they can relax and enjoy the wedding breakfast and the rest of the meal afterwards.
Having speeches before the meal also gives catering staff a little more time to prepare the food. It can be a challenge for caterers to get the timings right for food when all the speeches are after the meal, and even more difficult if people are speaking between courses. Speakers may also feel less pressure if their speech is one of several in a row, rather than being interrupted by meals in between.
From a photography perspective, the meal is often the photographer's break, so having the speeches before the meal means the photographer doesn't have to be on hand during their break, and can take a well-earned breather.
However, some people argue that having speeches before the meal means guests may still be finding their seats, chatting, or servers may be setting up, which can be noisy and distracting. If the speeches are done after the meal, guests are more likely to be attentive, having just come into the room. Speakers may also prefer to have a few drinks before speaking, which they can't do if the speeches are before the meal.
Ultimately, there is no right or wrong answer, and it's up to the couple to decide what they feel is best for their day.
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After the meal: Guests are properly fed and speakers can drink to boost confidence
There are several advantages to having wedding speeches after the meal. Firstly, guests are likely to be hungry, especially if they have been attending the wedding ceremony all day and only had a few canapes to keep them going. Serving the meal first ensures that your guests are properly fed and they don't have to try and finish eating whilst listening to the speeches or wait for ages for others to finish eating before the speeches can start.
Secondly, having the speeches after the meal means that the speakers can relax and enjoy their meal beforehand without the anticipation of having to speak hanging over them. This is especially beneficial for those who are nervous about public speaking. They can also drink alcohol to boost their confidence, although this may be a double-edged sword as they could end up having one too many and slurring their words!
Thirdly, from a logistical perspective, having the speeches after the meal means that the catering team can focus on getting the food out to all the guests without worrying about the timing of the speeches. It also avoids the risk of guests getting up to use the bathroom or move around and mingle during the speeches.
Finally, some people believe that having the speeches after the meal is more traditional and provides a nice conclusion to the formal part of the day before the party begins. It also gives guests something to look forward to and provides a natural break between the meal and the next part of the celebrations.
However, there is no right or wrong answer when it comes to the timing of wedding speeches. Some people prefer to have them before the meal to get them out of the way and create an icebreaker for guests. Ultimately, it is up to the couple to decide what works best for them and their wedding timeline.
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During the meal: Provides bite-sized entertainment and helps speakers stick to timings
There are several advantages to having wedding speeches during the meal. Firstly, it provides bite-sized entertainment for guests, giving them something to talk about and breaking up the meal. This can be especially useful for guests who don't know each other, helping to facilitate conversation and break the ice.
Secondly, having speeches during the meal can help speakers stick to their timings. Speakers may be more mindful of the time if they know that the next course is on its way, preventing speeches from dragging on for too long.
Additionally, having speeches during the meal can help with the flow of the wedding. By providing entertainment and keeping guests engaged, there is less risk of guests becoming antsy or losing interest, which may happen if speeches are done after the meal when guests are ready to move around and mingle.
However, there are also some potential drawbacks to consider. For example, if speeches are done too early during the meal, guests may still be finding their seats or chatting, which can be noisy and distracting. Similarly, if speeches are done towards the end of the meal, there may be distractions caused by waiting staff collecting plates or guests getting up to use the bathroom.
Ultimately, the decision of when to have wedding speeches is a personal preference, and there is no one-size-fits-all approach. Some people may prefer to have the speeches before the meal to get them out of the way, while others may opt for the more traditional approach of having them after the meal.
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Before guests are seated: Guests are fresh and attentive, and speakers grab their attention
There are several benefits to holding wedding speeches before guests are seated. Firstly, guests are more likely to be fresh and attentive, having just arrived, and speakers are more likely to grab their attention. This also avoids any distractions that may occur during the meal, such as guests chatting amongst themselves, servers shuffling around, or the noise of plates and cutlery.
Secondly, holding speeches before the meal allows for a smoother flow to the event, with guests instantly engaged in an activity and avoiding any awkward small talk at the table. It also provides a natural ice-breaker, giving guests something to talk about as soon as the speeches finish, rather than repeating safe topics like the weather or how they know the couple.
Thirdly, having speeches before the meal can be beneficial for nervous speakers. It allows them to get their speech out of the way and enjoy the rest of the wedding without anticipation or nerves. They can also relax and enjoy their meal without the looming thought of an upcoming speech.
Additionally, starting with the speeches can give the catering team some extra time to prepare the food, ensuring it is served at the optimal temperature and presentation.
However, there are also some potential drawbacks to consider. Guests may be hungry, having not eaten a full meal since lunch, and could be eager to be fed first. There is also the risk of speeches overlapping with canapes or cocktail hour, which could create a disjointed flow to the event.
Ultimately, the decision of when to hold wedding speeches is a personal preference, and there is no one-size-fits-all approach. Some couples may choose to follow tradition and place the speeches after the meal, while others may opt for a more modern approach, catering to nervous speakers or seeking a unique flow to their special day.
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After guests are seated: Guests have something to talk about and speakers can relax knowing it's done
There are several advantages to having wedding speeches after guests are seated and before food is served. Firstly, it provides guests with something to talk about right away, rather than engaging in small talk or discussing trivial topics like the weather. It also means that guests are fresh and attentive, having just arrived, and speakers can relax knowing their speech is done and they can enjoy the rest of the meal.
Indeed, for nervous speakers, giving a speech before food can be beneficial as it reduces the anticipation and allows them to enjoy the wedding sooner. It can also give the catering team some extra time to prepare the meal, ensuring it is served hot and all at once, without the challenge of coordinating speeches between courses.
Additionally, having speeches before the meal can help to grab guests' attention and avoid distractions. If speeches are done during or after the meal, guests may be antsy to move around and mingle, and there is a risk of people getting up to use the bathroom or starting to feel sleepy, especially if they have had a few drinks.
While tradition dictates that speeches should be conducted after the meal, ultimately, there is no right or wrong answer. The happy couple should do what feels best for their special day and their unique circumstances.
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Frequently asked questions
Wedding speeches can be given before or after food, depending on your preference. While tradition states that wedding speeches should be conducted after the meal, many couples opt to get them out of the way before the meal so that they can relax and enjoy the food.
Giving wedding speeches before food means that guests have something to focus on instantly, avoiding the dreaded small talk at the table. It also means that speakers don't have to worry about their speeches throughout the meal and can relax and enjoy the food.
Giving wedding speeches after food means that guests are properly fed and don't have to worry about missing out on the meal. It also gives them something to look forward to after they've eaten. Additionally, the speeches can act as a nice conclusion to the meal, rounding off the day's formalities.
While it is possible to give wedding speeches during the meal, it can be logistically challenging for caterers and may interrupt the flow of the meal for guests. It can also be difficult for photographers and videographers to capture the speeches effectively if they are broken up between courses.
