
Wedding RSVPs are an important part of the wedding planning process, allowing couples to manage their guest list and make necessary arrangements. While some couples opt for online RSVPs, others prefer the traditional route of mailed responses. For mailed responses, the question arises whether to include a stamped, addressed envelope with the invitation. This is a matter of etiquette, convenience, and cost considerations. Some sources suggest including postage to make it convenient for guests to respond, while others view it as wasteful, especially if guests can also respond online. Ultimately, the decision depends on the couple's preferences and what works best for their guest list.
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What You'll Learn

Online or by mail?
Wedding RSVP cards are a crucial part of your wedding stationery suite, providing an easy way for you and your guests to manage your invitations. They are typically mailed out with the wedding invitations, and guests fill them out, put them in a pre-addressed envelope, and mail them back to let you know if they will be attending.
However, in today's digital world, many couples are opting for online RSVPs as well. This can be a great way to save money and time, as you don't need to pay for RSVP envelopes or postage, and you can get responses quickly and easily. Online RSVPs can also be a more environmentally friendly option, as they reduce paper waste.
If you choose to do online RSVPs, you can include your wedding website, email address, or phone number on the invitation, and guests can respond electronically. There are also websites and apps specifically designed for collecting wedding RSVPs, such as Paperless Post, which can make the process even easier and more organized.
On the other hand, some couples prefer the tradition and formality of mailed RSVP cards. Mailed responses can be a nice way to build excitement as you eagerly check your mailbox each day for responses. Additionally, older guests or those who are less tech-savvy may prefer this more familiar method.
Ultimately, the decision of whether to do online or mail RSVPs is a personal one and should be based on what works best for you and your partner. You can even offer both options to give your guests the choice and maximize your chances of getting timely responses.
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What to include on the card
Wedding RSVP cards are a crucial piece of your wedding stationery suite, providing an easy way for you and your guests to manage your invitations. The RSVP card is where guests will fill in their names, indicate whether they will attend, and perhaps select their meal choice.
It is important to get the timing right so that you can make sure all of your last-minute wedding details are in order. It is recommended that your wedding RSVPs should be due at least four weeks before the wedding, and absolutely no later than two weeks before the wedding day. The sweet spot for your RSVP due date is around three to four weeks before the wedding. This gives you enough time to organize your final guest list and figure out who (if anyone) hasn't responded yet. It also gives you time to finalize your guest list and send wedding invitations.
To make it easier for your guests to return their RSVP cards, you can include a stamped, addressed envelope. This makes the process as simple as possible for your guests. If you are concerned about the cost of stamps, you could consider including stamps on the envelopes of those you know will prefer to mail their response, and skip the stamps for those who are likely to respond online. Alternatively, you could include your email address, phone number, or a link to your wedding website, and ask your guests to respond there.
The RSVP card should include an RSVP deadline, the names of the guests, a "Yes" or "No" attendance line, and potentially an entree selection. For formal invitations, the line where guests are expected to write their names can begin with an "M" to indicate that the guest(s) should include the proper courtesy title (Mr., Mrs., Ms., or Miss) before their name(s).
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When to send them
Wedding RSVPs should be due at least four weeks before the wedding, and absolutely no later than two weeks before the big day. The sweet spot for your RSVP due date is around three to four weeks before the wedding—this gives you enough time to organize your final guest list and figure out who (if anyone) hasn't responded yet. It's also important to consider your vendors' needs—caterers and venues need to know around a month in advance, so you want to get your headcount together for that. Final billing normally happens 30 days out for most vendors, including florals and table linens.
Some sources suggest sending out save-the-date cards as early as possible to give guests a heads-up to mark their calendars if they wish to join you. This doesn't require a response or commitment. Once you've picked the day of your wedding, you can send a save-the-date.
It's recommended that wedding invitations be mailed six to eight weeks before the wedding, giving guests a window of about one month to RSVP. This strikes a balance between being too close or too far from the wedding date. Giving guests too much time to RSVP may cause procrastination, while too little time may result in scheduling conflicts.
If you're collecting RSVPs online, you can prompt them to respond on your wedding website. It's also possible to ask guests to email their responses to your wedding planner.
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Who to address them to
When addressing wedding RSVP envelopes, it is not necessary to address them to yourself and your partner. Instead, consider addressing them to the person or couple responsible for collecting, tracking, and organising the invitation RSVPs. This could be a wedding planner, coordinator, or parents who are helping with the planning or hosting the wedding.
If you are having a big wedding, the cost of postage stamps for each RSVP envelope can add up quickly. In such cases, you may want to consider providing a wedding website or email address where guests can respond. Alternatively, you could include your phone number and ask guests to text in their responses. This is also a great way to ensure you receive responses from guests who may be too busy or forgetful to post a reply.
However, if you prefer mailed responses, it is considered rude to expect your guests to pay for their own postage. Therefore, you should include a pre-stamped envelope with each invitation to make it as easy as possible for your guests to respond. This is especially important for formal invitations.
For mailed responses, it is also important to set an RSVP deadline and stick to it. The deadline should be at least four weeks before the wedding and no later than two weeks before. This will give you enough time to finalise your guest list, create a seating chart, and provide final numbers to your caterer and venue.
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Whether to include a stamp
- Budget Constraints: Stamps can add up, especially for large weddings. If you're concerned about costs, offering online RSVP options or providing unstamped envelopes can help you save money. Some guests may prefer the convenience of online responses, reducing the number of stamps needed.
- Formality of the Wedding: Weddings are typically formal events, and a printed invitation with a response card and a pre-stamped envelope adds a touch of elegance and tradition. If you're planning a formal wedding, including a stamped envelope is a thoughtful gesture that aligns with the tone of your celebration.
- Guest Considerations: Think about your guest list and their preferences. Older guests or those less comfortable with technology may prefer the traditional method of mailing a response card. Including a stamped envelope for these guests ensures they won't have to incur postage costs. On the other hand, younger or tech-savvy guests may be more likely to respond online, making stamps unnecessary for this portion of your invitees.
- Response Rate: Keep in mind that not everyone will return their RSVP cards, even with a pre-paid envelope. Some guests may opt to respond online or may forget to reply altogether. If you're concerned about response rates, providing a stamped envelope might increase the likelihood of receiving timely responses, but it's not a guarantee.
- Convenience and Courtesy: Offering a pre-stamped envelope is considered courteous and convenient for your guests. It eliminates the hassle of your guests having to find and affix a stamp, ensuring they can quickly drop their response in the mail. This is especially important if you're requesting that guests provide additional information, such as meal choices or dietary restrictions, on their RSVP cards.
Ultimately, the decision to include a stamp on your wedding RSVP envelopes is a personal choice. Consider your budget, the tone of your wedding, and your guests' preferences to make an informed decision. You can also offer multiple response options, such as online and postal RSVPs, to cater to a wide range of guest preferences and increase the likelihood of timely responses.
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Frequently asked questions
It is not necessary to include an envelope with wedding RSVPs. However, if you are expecting a mailed response, it is considered rude to make your guests pay for their own postage, so you should include a pre-stamped envelope.
Including a pre-stamped envelope with your wedding RSVPs makes it easier for your guests to respond, which means you are more likely to receive their responses on time.
Instead of including an envelope, you can direct guests to respond via a wedding website, email, or phone.
Wedding RSVPs should be due at least four weeks before the wedding, and no later than two weeks before the wedding day.
Your wedding RSVP card should include an RSVP deadline, your guests' names, a "'Yes' or 'No' attendance line", and entree selection.











































