Deborah Chan
Wedding guest etiquette can be tricky to navigate. While some couples designate a table for cards and gifts, it is not always the case. If you have already sent a gift to the couple, you do not need to bring an additional gift to the wedding. However, if you want to bring something, a card is a thoughtful gesture. It is also a good idea to bring a card if you are giving money as a gift, so it is not easily misplaced or stolen.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Should you bring a card to a wedding? | It is not required to bring a card to a wedding, especially if you have already sent a gift. However, it is a nice gesture and can be helpful for the couple when writing thank-you cards. |
| When to send a card? | It is preferable to send the card before the wedding or bring it to the wedding reception. |
| Where to put the card at the wedding? | Some weddings have a designated table, box, or honour attendant for cards and gifts. Otherwise, you can give the card to the bride, groom, their mothers, or a bridesmaid. |
| Should you include a gift with the card? | It is not necessary to include a gift or money with the card, especially if you have already sent a gift. However, some people prefer to bring a card with cash or a cheque to the wedding. |
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What You'll Learn
If you've already sent a gift
If you have already sent a gift to the couple, it is not necessary to bring a card to the wedding. Sending a gift ahead of time is often more convenient for the couple, as they do not have to transport it home after the wedding.
However, some people may feel uncomfortable arriving at a wedding without anything to physically hand to the couple. In this case, it is perfectly acceptable to bring a card. Many weddings have a designated card box or gift table, so there will be somewhere to leave it. You could also give the card to the mother of the bride or groom, or a bridesmaid, to ensure it gets into the right hands without causing any hassle for the couple.
If you do bring a card, it is not necessary to include a gift or money. You could write a personal message to the couple, or explain that you have already sent a gift.
Some people prefer to bring a card as a memento of the day and to ensure they are not forgotten when the couple writes their thank-you cards. It is also a way to ensure your gift is not considered lost or stolen. However, it is important to remember that bringing a card is not required and you have already fulfilled your gift-giving obligations as a guest.
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Cards with cash
If you are giving cash, it is a good idea to bring a card. This is true even if you have already sent a gift, as it is a nice gesture and will avoid any confusion about whether a gift or card has gone missing. You could write something in the card to indicate that you have already sent a gift, such as "I hope you received the gift I sent in the post". If you have not sent a gift, you could include a note with the cash, such as "I hope the Kurig will make your AM a little smoother".
Some couples will designate a table for cards and gifts, particularly if they are expecting guests to bring gifts the old-fashioned way. If there is a designated card box, you can place your card inside. However, if there is no card box, you may prefer to give your card directly to the couple, or to a family member or honour attendant, to ensure it doesn't get lost or stolen.
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Card boxes
Wedding card boxes are a convenient way to collect cards and gifts from your guests. They can be placed on a designated table for cards and gifts, especially if you have guests who prefer to do things the traditional way.
There are various options available for card boxes, from cheap cardboard boxes to more expensive decorative boxes. You can even get a second-hand card box. For example, one person purchased a nice glass and gold-rimmed terrarium-style card box for $20 from the Facebook marketplace.
If you are concerned about security, you can have trustworthy guests or family members keep an eye on the box during the wedding. You can also put an empty but sealed envelope with your initials or names inside to indicate that it is a card box. At the end of the event, you can ask someone to take the cards and put them somewhere safe.
Some people also recommend having a locked box or safe to store cards and gifts during the wedding. This can be kept under a table or in a secure location to reduce the risk of theft.
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Gift tables
While it is not necessary to bring a physical gift to a wedding, some couples choose to designate a table for cards and gifts, especially if they expect guests to bring presents on the day. If there is no gift table, cards can be given to the mother of the bride or groom, or an honour attendant, to ensure they get into the right hands.
If you have already sent a gift to the couple before the wedding, it is not customary to bring another gift, but some guests may bring a card to wish the couple well. Cards can be placed in a card box on the gift table, or given to a trusted person to keep safe.
Some couples create a wedding website and digital registry for their guests to use. This is a convenient way for guests to buy presents, and for couples to receive them. Gifts can be bought directly from the registry and a note can be added to share your well-wishes.
It is worth noting that cards containing money or gift cards can be easily stolen at weddings, so it is best to avoid leaving them unattended on a gift table.
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Sending a card ahead of time
If you are sending a gift from a wedding registry, it is common for the package to be delivered straight to the couple, so you may wish to send a card separately. You could include a note in the card to mention that you have already sent a gift, so the couple knows to expect it.
Some people prefer to give money as a gift, which can be easily transferred online. If you choose to do this, sending a card ahead of time is a good opportunity to include a cheque or details of the money transfer. This can be a safer option than bringing money to the wedding, as cards and gifts can be stolen or misplaced during the celebrations.
Sending a card in advance can also be a good option if you are unable to attend the wedding. It is a simple way to show your support and congratulations to the couple, even if you can't be there in person.
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Frequently asked questions
It is not necessary to bring a card to a wedding, especially if you have already sent a gift to the couple. However, if you would like to bring a card, you can. It is a thoughtful gesture and can be cheap but written with love.
Cards are a way to send your congratulations and best wishes to the couple. They can also be used to let the couple know that you have already sent them a gift, so they don't expect one from you at the wedding.
You can write a simple congratulatory message, wishing the couple well on their special day and for their future together. If you have already sent a gift, you can mention this in the card.
Some weddings will have a designated table or box for cards and gifts. If not, you can give the card to the mother of the bride or groom, an honour attendant, or a bridesmaid, who can ensure it gets to the right person.
It is considered good etiquette to bring a gift to a wedding, typically a monetary gift or a gift from the couple's registry. However, if you have already sent a gift, there is no need to bring another one to the wedding.
