Rhiannon Hendricks
The tradition of the groom kissing the bride at weddings is not part of Catholic liturgy. In fact, the Second Vatican Council has declared that no person may add, remove or change anything in the liturgy on his own authority. However, some priests may whisper kiss her to the groom, and kissing may take place at the end of the Mass, when the priest introduces the couple as Mr and Mrs. In ancient Catholic traditions, the priest would give the groom the 'Kiss of Peace' by lightly kissing his lips or hands, before the groom kissed the bride.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Kissing during the wedding ceremony | Not part of the liturgy, but some priests may whisper "kiss her" |
| "You may kiss the bride" | Not part of the Catholic wedding rite, but some priests may say it softly |
| Kiss of Peace | A holy kiss passed from the priest to the groom and then to the bride |
| First Kiss | Usually after the Mass, when the couple is introduced as Mr. and Mrs. |
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What You'll Learn
The priest won't say you may now kiss the bride
The priest's role in a Catholic wedding is to conduct the marriage ceremony, which includes the nuptial blessing, the blessing of the rings, and the exchange of vows. The priest is not expected to say "you may now kiss the bride" as this is not a part of the traditional Catholic wedding liturgy.
The Second Vatican Council, the highest authority of the Church, has declared that no person, including a priest, can add, remove, or change anything in the sacred liturgy on their own authority. This means that the priest cannot deviate from the prescribed wedding rite, whether the ceremony is held within or apart from the Mass.
The tradition of the groom kissing the bride at the end of the wedding ceremony is often seen in non-Catholic weddings and is a popular cultural trope in movies and TV shows. In a Catholic wedding, the priest may introduce the newly married couple to the congregation as "Mr. and Mrs." following the Mass, and this is usually when the couple kisses.
Some couples may request that the priest include the phrase "you may now kiss the bride" during the ceremony, and some priests may be willing to accommodate this request, perhaps by whispering it to the couple. However, this is not a standard part of the Catholic wedding liturgy, and some priests may refuse to deviate from the traditional rite.
It is important to note that while the priest may not instruct the couple to kiss, there are other opportunities for a kiss during a Catholic wedding. For example, if the Sign of Peace is celebrated during the Mass, this can be an opportunity for a chaste kiss between the couple.
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The priest may give the groom a 'kiss of peace'
In ancient Catholic tradition, the priest would pronounce a couple married and then give the groom a 'kiss of peace'. This was done by lightly kissing the groom's lips to welcome Christ into the couple's union. The priest would then invite the groom to kiss his bride, passing on God's blessing to her.
This custom is mentioned in Romans, Corinthians, and other parts of the Holy Bible: "Greet each other with a holy kiss". The kiss was followed by the saying, "Christ is revealed among us", with the receiver responding, "Blessed is the revelation of Christ".
Over time, certain congregations began to have "moral concerns about over-vigorous kissing", and priests switched to kissing the shoulders and hands of the groom instead. Eventually, most priests stopped kissing the groom altogether, opting for a nod or a handshake, and leaving the kissing to the couple.
Today, it is not common for priests to say "you may kiss the bride" during Catholic weddings. Instead, the priest may introduce the couple as Mr. and Mrs., and the couple can kiss after this introduction. Some priests may even refuse to say "you may kiss the bride" or introduce the couple as husband and wife at the end of the ceremony.
It is important to note that the Second Vatican Council has declared that no person, including a priest, may add, remove, or change anything in the liturgy on their own authority. Therefore, any additions or changes to the wedding rite, such as including the "kiss of peace" or specific introductions, are subject to the guidelines and discretion of the Catholic Church.
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The bride and groom kiss after being introduced as Mr and Mrs
The tradition of the bride and groom kissing after being introduced as Mr and Mrs has its roots in Catholic wedding rituals. While the priest does not usually say "you may now kiss the bride" during Catholic weddings, the couple is typically presented as Mr and Mrs [Last Name] at the end of the Mass, and this is when the kiss usually takes place.
In Catholic weddings, the priest may refrain from explicitly mentioning the kiss to maintain the solemnity and divinity of the ceremony. The Second Vatican Council, the highest authority of the Church, has declared that no one, not even a priest, can add, remove, or change anything in the liturgy on their own authority. This includes refraining from saying "you may kiss the bride" or "I present to you for the first time Mr. and Mrs."
Instead, the priest may introduce the couple as Mr and Mrs, and the kiss may follow as a spontaneous expression of their marital bliss. This introduction is often considered a signal for the couple to share their first kiss as a married couple, without the priest needing to explicitly mention it.
Some couples may prefer this approach as it allows them to have a more private and intimate moment without feeling directed by the officiant. It also emphasizes the couple's agency in their marriage, reflecting the Catholic belief that matrimony is a mutual and freely chosen decision.
However, it is worth noting that some priests may be more flexible and open to including the phrase "you may now kiss the bride" or similar variations if requested by the couple. It is always best to discuss these preferences directly with the priest or officiant to ensure a clear understanding and alignment with the couple's wishes.
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The bride and groom kiss after exchanging vows
The moment when the bride and groom share their first kiss as a married couple is a highlight of many weddings. However, in Catholic weddings, the priest does not usually say the famous line "you may now kiss the bride". This is because the Second Vatican Council declared that no person, even a priest, can add or remove anything from the sacred liturgy.
That being said, there are a few alternatives to this tradition. One option is for the priest to introduce the couple as Mr and Mrs, which is typically when the couple will share their first kiss. Another option is for the priest to give the groom the 'Kiss of Peace' by lightly kissing his lips, and then inviting him to kiss his bride. This tradition has fallen out of favour in recent times, with priests instead kissing the groom's shoulder or hand, or simply nodding or shaking hands.
Some couples choose to forgo the kiss altogether, opting for a more subdued celebration. In one instance, the bride and groom processed out of the church without kissing, and their guests were left confused as to whether they were officially married.
Ultimately, whether or not to include a kiss in the wedding ceremony is a personal decision for the couple to make. It is important to discuss this with the priest beforehand to ensure that everyone is on the same page.
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The bride and groom kiss at the end of the mass
In a Catholic wedding, the priest does not usually say "you may now kiss the bride" or "you may kiss the bride". This is because the Second Vatican Council, the highest authority of the Church, has declared that no person, even a priest, can add, remove, or change anything in the liturgy on their own authority.
However, the bride and groom may still kiss at the end of the mass. This kiss usually happens after the priest introduces the couple as Mr. and Mrs. to the congregation. The couple may also choose to kiss each other during the Sign of Peace, but this kiss should be chaste and not overly enthusiastic.
Some couples have found creative alternatives to the traditional phrase, such as "you may now kiss each other" or "you may now seal your commitment with a kiss". It is important to note that the kiss is not a liturgical part of the wedding ceremony and is instead added in because of its popularity in movies and secular ceremonies.
The Catholic wedding ceremony, including the mass, usually lasts about an hour, but can sometimes be longer, up to an hour and a half. The ceremony includes the nuptial blessing, the blessing of the rings, communion, and the kiss at the very end.
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Frequently asked questions
Yes, the bride and groom do kiss at Catholic weddings. However, the priest does not usually say "You may now kiss the bride".
The Second Vatican Council declared that no person may "add, remove or change anything in the liturgy on his own authority". This means that a priest may not add things to the wedding rite, including the phrase "You may now kiss the bride".
The bride and groom usually kiss at the end of the Mass, after the priest has introduced them as, for example, "Mr. and Mrs. Smith".
In ancient Catholic traditions, the priest would give the groom the 'Kiss of Peace' by lightly kissing his lips or hands. After this, the priest would invite the groom to kiss his bride.
Yes, you can ask your priest to say this phrase. However, it is not guaranteed that they will agree to say it, as it is not part of the standard Catholic wedding liturgy.
