Franklin Dean
Wedding registries are a common tradition in American culture, but they are not customary in Chinese culture. Chinese-American brides, even those who are aware of the American custom, often choose not to create a bridal registry because asking for gifts is considered embarrassing in Chinese culture. Instead, guests at Chinese-American weddings are expected to bring cash, a check, or a gift card.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Wedding registry | Most Chinese-American brides do not have a bridal registry because it is considered embarrassing to ask for gifts |
| Wedding gifts | Guests are expected to bring cash, a check, or a gift card |
| Gift presentation | Gifts should be presented in a red envelope, which symbolizes good luck in Chinese culture |
| Wedding attire | Brides typically wear a white wedding dress, but may change into a red qipao (a traditional Chinese dress) for the reception |
| Wedding decorations | The color red is prominent in Chinese wedding decorations, symbolizing love, happiness, and prosperity |
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What You'll Learn
Chinese wedding colours: red and gold
In Chinese culture, the colours red and gold are very significant during weddings. Red symbolises happiness, joy, and prosperity. It is believed that the colour drives away evil spirits, which is why Chinese brides traditionally wear a red dress, often with gold embroidery, during their wedding. The red dress is known as a Qipao, or a Cheongsam, and is a one-piece dress that often features elaborate gold or silver designs.
Gold symbolises wealth, fortune and power. In ancient China, gold was worn exclusively by the royal family, which is why gold symbolises nobility. It is common for brides to wear gold at some point during their wedding, be it a gold dress, or a dress with gold embroidery or accents.
The combination of red and gold is believed to bring good luck, which is why the colours are often used together in Chinese weddings. For instance, a bride could wear a gold dress with red roses, or a red dress with gold embroidery.
It is important to note that while red is a very popular colour for brides to wear, it is considered disrespectful for guests to wear red to a Chinese wedding. This is because it could be seen as an attempt to upstage the bride, and may confuse vendors who expect the bride to be wearing red.
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Chinese tea ceremony
The Chinese tea ceremony, also known as cha dao, is a significant tradition in Chinese weddings. It involves the couple serving tea to their parents, future in-laws, and other elders such as grandparents, aunts, and uncles. This act symbolises the couple's gratitude, respect, and the union of their two families.
The ceremony usually takes place at the respective family homes of the bride and groom, with the couple dressed in traditional attire. The bride is often getting ready with her bridal party at her family home, while the groom and groomsmen pick her up and negotiate entrance with the bridesmaids. The ceremony can then take place with each side of the family. In some cases, the ceremony is held at a separate venue or on a different day, especially when incorporating other cultural traditions.
During the ceremony, the couple kneels before their elders, who are seated, and serves them tea with the assistance of attendants or bridesmaids. After drinking the tea, the elders express their well wishes and blessings, often placing their cups back on the tray and presenting the couple with red envelopes containing money, symbolising their approval of the marriage.
The Chinese tea ceremony is a meaningful ritual that allows the couple to honour their families and heritage. It is considered one of the most important components of a Chinese wedding, signifying the official union of the couple in the eyes of Chinese tradition.
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Japanese wedding attire
Wedding attire in Japan varies depending on whether the wedding is traditional or contemporary. Traditional weddings typically involve the bride and groom wearing formal kimono ensembles, while contemporary weddings may incorporate non-Japanese features such as white wedding dresses and tuxedos.
Traditional Japanese Wedding Attire
In traditional Japanese weddings, the bride typically wears a white kimono and obi, which are covered with a colourful overcoat called an iro-uchikake. This overcoat is usually hand-woven or carefully embroidered and features auspicious symbols such as large cranes. The hairstyle is generally Western, and the bride may also carry a fan and wear ornaments and accessories. The groom wears a formal kimono-hakama-haori ensemble.
Contemporary Japanese Wedding Attire
Contemporary Japanese weddings can often include multiple ceremonies, such as a Shinto ceremony, a Buddhist ceremony, and a Christian-style ceremony. For a Shinto ceremony, the bride wears a shiromuku ensemble, which consists of a white shiro-kakeshita kimono tied with a white obi, and a white shiromuku kimono worn open. For a Buddhist ceremony or the reception, the bride wears an uchikake ensemble. During a Christian-style ceremony in a chapel, the bride wears a Western-style white wedding gown, and the groom wears a tuxedo.
Guest Attire
Guests at Japanese weddings usually dress modestly, with women wearing dresses or slacks with a nice top, and men dressing similarly to how they would for a funeral, but with white socks and a white tie instead of black.
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Korean wedding food
Korean wedding banquets can be very simple, with noodle soup being the only required dish. The banquet is called kook-soo-sang, or "noodle banquet", and the dish is also referred to as Janchi Guksu, or "party/banquet noodles". The long noodles symbolise a wish for a long and happy life and marriage. The soup is boiled in beef broth and garnished with vegetables and shredded eggs. Yaksik, or yakbap, a sweet dish that translates to "medicinal food" or "medicinal rice", is also served.
A traditional Korean wedding ceremony involves a table called daeryesang placed between the bride and groom. The table setting varies by region but usually consists of rice wine, rice cakes, chestnuts, jujubes, and other foods, as well as a vase with pine and bamboo branches, red and blue candles, and a live rooster and hen wrapped in red and blue clothes.
Foods prepared by the bride's family for the groom's parents are called pyebaek. Chestnuts and jujubes are offered to the groom's father, and pyeonpo (Korean steamed beef patty), yukpo (Korean beef jerky), and braised chicken to the mother. The groom's father also gives jujubes to his new daughter-in-law, which represent fertility.
Korean-American weddings may feature fusion dishes, such as Korean tacos, or seafood, which is widely enjoyed. A Korean-American wedding may also incorporate Korean food into appetisers and/or desserts, with a separate caterer providing other cuisines.
Monkfish bake is another dish that has been served at Korean weddings.
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Chinese-American wedding gifts
Wedding registries are uncommon in Chinese weddings, as directly asking for gifts or money is considered disrespectful and greedy. Instead, guests usually gift the couple with a red envelope, also known as "hong bao" in Chinese, which represents good fortune. The amount of money inside is typically equivalent to the price of a nice gift at a Western wedding, and the money should be new and crisp.
If you want to give the newlyweds a gift instead, traditional options include 24-karat gold jewellery or decorative objects for their home. The dragon and phoenix symbolise everlasting love and marital bliss, while Mandarin duck jewellery or figurines are said to promote love and marriage. The lily or lotus flower, given to the bride, represents children and a long-lasting and happy union.
Other gift ideas include personalised chopsticks, a gold rice bowl set, or a "Ruyi", a curved decorative object symbolising power and good fortune.
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Frequently asked questions
While it is common for American-born Chinese brides to register in the American way, most Chinese-American brides do not. Asking for gifts is considered embarrassing in Chinese culture.
It is customary to bring cash, a check, or a gift card to an Asian wedding. If you want to be culturally appropriate, put the money or gift card in a red envelope.
Red is linked to love, success, happiness, prosperity, luck, fertility, honour, and loyalty in Chinese culture.
You can write your best wishes for the couple on the envelope and use that in place of a wedding card.
A red envelope typically contains money or gold jewellery.
