The Show Can Go On: Weddings After An Objection

The tradition of allowing wedding objections dates back to the 12th century when the Catholic Church introduced it to ensure the legality of a union before making it official. While it is very uncommon for someone to object during a modern wedding, it is still possible. If an objection occurs, the wedding officiant typically has two options: they can either take the objecting person aside to privately discuss their concerns or ignore the objection and continue with the ceremony. In most cases, weddings can continue after an objection unless there are valid legal reasons or the couple chooses not to proceed.

The officiant pauses the ceremony

If someone objects during a wedding ceremony, the officiant may pause the ceremony. This is not a common occurrence, but it can happen. The officiant has two options: they can either take the objector to another room to privately understand their reason for the objection or they can ignore the objection and continue with the ceremony as normal.

If the officiant chooses to address the objection, they will take the objector to another room to understand their reason for objecting. This could be a legal reason, such as the bride or groom being already married, or it could be a personal vendetta. If the objection is found to be valid, the officiant may decide to postpone the wedding until the situation has been thoroughly investigated.

On the other hand, if the officiant chooses to ignore the objection, the wedding guests will usually deal with the objector and encourage them to leave. This option is more likely to be chosen if the objection is minor and does not have any legal standing.

In modern times, the tradition of asking for objections during a wedding ceremony has become less common. This is because it is now much easier to check for any legal impediments to a marriage before the wedding day. However, the officiant may still choose to include this tradition in the ceremony, especially if it is a religious ceremony.

If a couple is concerned about a potential objection, they can let the officiant know beforehand so that they can be prepared to handle the situation.

The couple talk to the objector in private

If someone objects to a marriage at the wedding, the first thing the officiant will do is pause the ceremony. This gives the couple an opportunity to chat with the objector in private. The couple can then decide whether to restart the ceremony or not.

If the couple decides to speak to the objector in private, they should emphasise their appreciation for the objector's concerns, but also reinforce their relationship. For example, they could say something like: "We appreciate you sharing your concerns, but we feel differently." It's important to remember that the couple is not obligated to justify their decision to get married. Instead, they should calmly thank the objector for their concern and move on.

After the private conversation, the couple can decide whether to continue with the ceremony or take a break. If they choose to continue, the officiant can make a brief apology for the interruption and thank everyone for their support. It's crucial to handle the situation with care and respect the emotions of all parties involved.

To prevent an objection from disrupting the wedding, it's advisable to speak to invited guests ahead of time, especially those who are known to have complaints or reservations about the union. In some cases, it may be best to delicately rescind the invitation, preferably in person along with an explanation. Ultimately, the couple has the power to decide how to handle an objection and can choose to ignore it and proceed with the ceremony, address it privately, or take a break to gather themselves.

The ceremony continues

If a couple has concerns about a real objection happening on their big day, they can let the officiant know so they aren't blindsided during the ceremony. The officiant can then break the ice and keep the ceremony going. For example, they could say something like: "If someone objects to this wedding, speak now or forever hold your peace—except for Aunt Trudie."

If an objection happens out of the blue, the officiant can note it and move on with the ceremony. Some couples may want the officiant to halt the ceremony to deal with the objection in private, but that depends on what the couple is comfortable with.

If the objection is minor and doesn't have any legal standing, the officiant may just keep going with the ceremony without pausing.

If the couple wishes to finish the ceremony, the wedding may go on if someone objects. Sure, there may be some tension with the objector, but it doesn't mean the ceremony can't continue. The couple could take a moment to gather themselves and then pick up where they left off.

In the case of an objection, the person who objected may be asked to leave. This has happened before, with the couple immediately identifying the person as a guest they had reservations about and politely asking for them to be escorted out by security.

There is also an option to pull the objecting party to a separate room during the wedding to hear their reasons.

The objector is asked to leave

If someone objects during a wedding ceremony, the officiant has a couple of options. One option is to ask the objector to leave. This could be done by escorting them out or asking them to leave voluntarily. This option is often taken when the couple has already expressed their reservations about the guest.

If the objection is minor and doesn't have any legal standing, the officiant may simply continue with the ceremony. In this case, the wedding guests usually deal with the objector and encourage them to leave.

The officiant could also take the objector to another room to privately give their reason for the objection. If the objection is emotional rather than legal, the officiant can then acknowledge the objection, realise that it carries no legal substance, and proceed with the wedding.

The couple may also want to take a break to privately discuss the objection with the objector, before deciding whether or not to continue with the ceremony.

The couple decide not to continue

If a couple decides not to continue with the ceremony after an objection, the first step is to take a moment to pause and gather themselves. They may want to take a break to discuss the objection and consider their next steps. This can be a very upsetting and unexpected turn of events, so it is important that the couple takes the time they need to process what has happened.

During this pause, the officiant or wedding planner should take the objecting person to another room to discuss their reasons for the objection. This conversation should be kept private and discrete to avoid causing further disruption to the wedding ceremony. It is important that the couple's wishes are respected and that they are given the space and time they need to make a decision about how to proceed.

If the objection is found to have legal merit, the wedding may need to be postponed or cancelled altogether. In this case, the officiant would be obligated to discontinue the service and an investigation would be conducted by the local authorities. However, in most cases, objections are made on emotional or moral grounds, which do not hold legal weight.

If the couple decides not to continue with the wedding, the officiant should apologise to the guests for the interruption and bring the ceremony to a close. The couple may also want to reach out to their guests after the fact to explain what happened and assure them of their decision. It is important that the couple feels supported and respected during this difficult time.

While it is uncommon for objections to occur during modern wedding ceremonies, it is important to be prepared and know how to handle such a situation. By staying calm and following the appropriate steps, couples can ensure that their wedding day, even if it doesn't go exactly as planned, is still a respectful and positive experience for all involved.

Frequently asked questions