Planning A Wedding: What To Do Amidst Uncertainty

Planning a wedding can be stressful, and sometimes, unforeseen circumstances can force couples to cancel or postpone their big day. From hurricanes to the COVID-19 pandemic, various factors can disrupt even the best-laid plans. However, it's important to remember that wedding cancellations or postponements can also result from personal reasons, such as relationship issues or simply having different visions for the perfect wedding. While it may be emotionally and financially draining to cancel a wedding, it's crucial to address any issues or concerns before proceeding with the ceremony.

Can a wedding go ahead during the COVID-19 pandemic?

The COVID-19 pandemic has disrupted the lives of billions of people worldwide, including couples who want to get married. The pandemic has caused many weddings to be delayed or cancelled, but some couples have been able to go ahead with their weddings, albeit with certain adjustments and restrictions in place.

The impact of the pandemic on weddings has varied depending on local regulations and the preferences of the couple. Some couples have chosen to postpone their weddings until a later date when restrictions are more lenient, while others have opted for smaller, more intimate ceremonies with only their closest family and friends in attendance. In some cases, couples have had to make last-minute changes to their wedding plans due to changing restrictions and lockdowns.

To ensure the safety of guests, couples getting married during the pandemic may implement safety protocols such as mask mandates, social distancing, and outdoor venues. Some couples may also choose to have a virtual wedding or elopement to avoid putting their loved ones at risk. It is important for couples to be clear and thoughtful when communicating these safety protocols to their guests.

Additionally, the pandemic has caused many couples to incur financial losses due to cancelled or postponed weddings. To minimise these losses, it is crucial to hire professionals with solid contracts and previous experience in planning weddings during the pandemic. Contracts should include normal cancellation clauses as well as force majeure cancellation or postponement clauses that specifically address pandemic-related restrictions.

Despite the challenges posed by the COVID-19 pandemic, couples can still make their wedding day a memorable and joyful occasion. By adapting to the circumstances and prioritising the health and safety of their guests, couples can celebrate their love while also adhering to the necessary restrictions.

Can a couple still get married if they have drifted apart?

It is not uncommon for couples to drift apart over the course of their marriage. This can be due to a variety of reasons, such as the birth of a child, busy work lives, infidelity, or simply falling out of love. If a couple has drifted apart, it does not necessarily mean that their marriage is over. There are several steps that can be taken to try and rekindle the relationship and get it back on track. Here are some suggestions:

• Take responsibility and avoid blame: Recognize that both partners have a part to play in the relationship dynamic and avoid placing blame solely on one person.
• Prioritize the relationship: Make the relationship a top priority by devoting time and energy to nurturing it. This may involve scheduling regular date nights or couple activities to ensure quality time is spent together.
• Improve communication: Clear and open communication is key to rebuilding a connection. Be willing to express your feelings, address any misgivings, and actively listen to your partner.
• Rekindle physical intimacy: Physical intimacy, such as holding hands, hugging, and sexual intercourse, helps build trust and emotional intimacy within the relationship.
• Pursue shared interests: Investigate each other's interests and hobbies, or discover new shared activities to create a sense of connection and fun within the relationship.
• Seek professional help: If you feel you have drifted apart and are unsure how to improve the relationship, consider seeking marriage counseling to help you reconnect and strengthen your bond.
• Evaluate your priorities: If you feel you and your partner are no longer putting in the effort to keep the spark alive, it may be time to reevaluate your priorities and determine if your relationship is still a priority for both of you.
• Address feelings of resentment: If one partner feels they are putting in more effort than the other, it can lead to feelings of resentment. Communicate openly about expectations and work together to find a balance that meets both your needs.
• Create boundaries: Establish healthy boundaries to take care of your own emotional well-being. Boundaries can help you communicate your needs and expectations to your partner without attempting to control their behavior.

By taking these steps and actively working on the relationship, couples who have drifted apart can potentially rekindle their connection and find their way back to each other. It is important to remember that both partners need to be willing to put in the effort and make changes for a successful outcome.

What if one person no longer wants a wedding?

If one person no longer wants a wedding, it is important to consider the reasons behind this decision. Are they having cold feet or are there deeper issues in the relationship? It is crucial to have an open and honest conversation about the concerns and try to resolve them together. Seeking couples counselling can be helpful in working through any problems and improving communication.

If the person is certain that they no longer want to get married, it is important to respect their decision. Cancelling a wedding can be a difficult and emotional process, but it is important to put the well-being of both individuals first. There may be financial implications and logistical challenges, but these can be managed with proper planning and support from loved ones.

It is normal to feel a range of emotions, such as sadness, confusion, and anger, during this time. Seeking individual counselling or therapy can help one process these emotions and navigate the next steps. Surrounding oneself with a support system of friends and family can also provide comfort and guidance.

Additionally, it is important to be mindful of the impact on the other person in the relationship. If they are still committed to the wedding, they may feel hurt, confused, and rejected. Open communication and empathy are crucial in navigating this challenging situation together.

Finally, it is essential to take the time to heal and process before rushing into any new commitments. Reflecting on what went wrong and working on personal growth can help one approach future relationships with more clarity and confidence.

Should a wedding go ahead if a bride realises guests are still standing?

Asking guests to stand during a wedding ceremony is a divisive topic. Some people believe it is poor hospitality, while others think it is a new and cool idea. The decision to have guests stand or sit during a wedding ceremony depends on several factors, including the couple's religion and culture, the length of the ceremony, and the guests' physical limitations.

In some religions and cultures, the couple may face forward instead of each other and may sit for parts or all of the ceremony. In these cases, guests are usually seated as well. However, if the couple belongs to a religion or culture where the couple faces each other, it is recommended that they choose to stand in order to maintain an emotional connection and allow the guests to see their faces.

According to etiquette expert Elaine Swann, the only time it is appropriate to ask guests to stand is during certain parts of the ceremony if dictated by religion or culture, such as standing for prayer or to watch the bride walk down the aisle. She emphasizes that guest comfort should be a top priority, and standing for an extended period may not be comfortable for all guests, especially the elderly or those with physical limitations.

Wedding planner Fallon Carter recommends that if a couple chooses to have a standing ceremony, it is best to keep the guest list intimate, with 75 or fewer guests, to ensure everyone can see. She also suggests providing foldable shoes or flip-flops, offering light bites and water beforehand, and keeping the ceremony short, around ten minutes or less.

In the end, the decision to have guests stand or sit during a wedding ceremony is a personal choice and should consider the comfort and needs of the guests in attendance. If the bride realizes that the guests are still standing and it is causing discomfort or hindering their ability to see, it may be a good idea to pause the ceremony and ask the guests to be seated. This can help create a more relaxed and enjoyable atmosphere for everyone involved.

What if guests with children ignore a 'no kids' rule?

Deciding whether or not to invite children to your wedding can be a tricky issue, especially when close family or friends are involved. If you've made it clear from the outset that your wedding will be adults-only, there is still a chance that some guests will ignore your no-kids rule. Here are some steps you can take to avoid this situation and deal with it if it arises:

Be Clear and Consistent

It's important to communicate your no-kids policy as early and clearly as possible. Address your invitations only to the adults who are invited, and consider including a note with the invitations to explain that children are not included. Be consistent and apply the rule to all guests—making exceptions for some guests but not others is likely to cause tension and hurt feelings.

Inform Close Family Members

Make sure your immediate families know about your "no-kids" policy as soon as you've made the decision, so they can share this information with anyone they've invited. This will help to spread the message and ensure that all guests are aware of the rule.

Provide Information on Your Wedding Website

Include a mention of your adults-only policy on your wedding website, so that guests are informed in advance. This will give them time to coordinate childcare if needed.

Be Understanding, But Firm

Even if you don't have children yourself, try to be empathetic towards parents. It can be hard for them to leave their children, especially when they are very young. However, it's important to stay firm on your no-kids rule. Explain that you love their children, but due to budget or venue constraints, you've had to make some tough decisions.

Be Prepared for Pushback

Even if you've communicated your policy clearly, you may still encounter some pushback from guests. Remember, it's your wedding day, and you and your partner get to decide who's invited. Be sensitive when dealing with upset parents, but don't back down. If you have the budget, you could consider hiring a babysitter to watch their children during the wedding as a compromise.

Accept That Some Parents May Not Attend

You are justified in having a child-free wedding, and guests are justified in choosing not to attend if it's inconvenient or if they don't want to be away from their children. Don't take it personally if some guests with children decide not to come.

Be Flexible with Your Destination Wedding Plans

If you're having a destination wedding, it may be more difficult for parents to travel without their children or find childcare in another country. In this case, you may want to reconsider your kid-free policy or provide alternative options, such as a creche or professional babysitters.

Provide Entertainment for Children, If Necessary

If you've decided to include children in parts of your wedding, such as the ceremony or early reception, be sure to have a plan for keeping them entertained. This could include hiring a professional babysitting service or providing a separate room or area for children to play and sleep.

In summary, clear and early communication is key to avoiding any issues with guests ignoring your no-kids rule. Be empathetic towards parents, but stay firm on your decision, and be prepared to deal with any pushback sensitively. Ultimately, it's your wedding day, and you can choose whether or not to include children.

Frequently asked questions