Your Wedding Night: Partying After Tying The Knot

Planning a wedding can be a stressful experience, with many couples feeling the pressure of expectation from friends and family. One way to reduce this pressure is to do away with the tradition of a wedding party, which can create a more relaxed atmosphere for the happy couple. This also has the benefit of reducing costs, as there are no expenses for dresses, tux rentals, hair and makeup, gifts, and bachelor/bachelorette parties.

However, this does not mean that the celebrations have to be muted. Wedding after-parties are a great way to extend the festivities and allow the newlyweds to truly let loose. These can be held at a different venue or in the same room as the reception, with a simple change of lighting and music to signal the transition.

Pre-wedding jitters: Should you spend the night before apart?

The night before your wedding can be a magical time, full of excitement and anticipation for the big day. But it can also be a time of nerves and jitters, especially if you're considering spending it apart from your partner. So, what's the best course of action?

Well, it depends! Spending the night before your wedding apart from your partner has been a tradition for centuries, rooted in the belief that it brings good luck and preserves the mystery until the wedding day. In ancient times, it was common for marriages to be arranged, and spending the night apart helped ensure that the groom was indeed marrying the bride he was promised. In some cultures, it was also done to protect the bride's virginity and maintain a sense of mystery.

Today, many couples still choose to spend the night before their wedding apart, seeing it as a fun way to build anticipation and create a memorable moment when they finally see each other at the ceremony. It can also be a nice way to spend one last night with family or friends before starting your new life together.

However, modern couples also have the option to spend the night together. If you live together, it might feel strange to sleep apart, and you may want the comfort and calm of your partner's presence the night before your wedding. It's also an opportunity to wake up together and have a private moment before the chaos of the day begins.

Ultimately, the decision of whether to spend the night before your wedding apart or together is a personal one. You can choose to follow tradition or create your own. If you decide to spend the night apart, you can still communicate with your partner through letters or phone calls, and you can involve your bridal party or family in your plans for the evening.

Remember, it's your wedding, and you can choose to spend the night before in a way that feels right for you. Whether you're surrounded by loved ones or enjoying a quiet moment with your partner, make sure to get plenty of rest and hydration—you'll want to look and feel your best on your big day!

Bachelor and bachelorette parties: Who plans them if there's no wedding party?

Bachelor and bachelorette parties are pre-wedding celebrations in honour of the bride and groom-to-be. These parties are typically planned by the maid or matron of honour, with additional help from bridesmaids, groomsmen, or other members of the wedding party. However, there are no set rules, and ultimately, the planning can be a group effort. If there is no wedding party, the event can still take place, but it may not be the party the couple envisioned. Here are some tips for planning bachelor and bachelorette parties when there is no official wedding party:

Choose a planner:

Even without a wedding party, someone will need to take the lead on planning. This person should be organised and preferably enjoy coordinating logistics. They will be in charge of finalising the guest list, choosing a date and location, and booking travel and accommodations. It is important to remember that without a designated wedding party, guests will assume they are just that—guests. So, be sure to communicate any requests for help with wedding tasks well in advance.

Finalise the guest list:

The guest list for the bachelor or bachelorette party can include close friends and family members, regardless of their role in the wedding. It is important to remember that anyone invited to the pre-wedding festivities should also be invited to the wedding itself. This is also an opportunity to consider any cultural traditions that the bride or groom may want to incorporate into the celebration.

Discuss the budget:

Planning a bachelor or bachelorette party can be expensive, so it is essential to discuss budgets with guests early on. Send out a survey to gather information on invitees' budgets, availability, and willingness to help with planning. Be mindful that guests may also be budgeting for other wedding-related costs, such as attire, gifts, and beauty treatments.

Choose a date and location:

Finalising the date and location early is crucial, especially if guests need to travel. Consider the bride or groom's preferences for the type of celebration they want, whether it's a low-key gathering or a destination party. Also, keep in mind that the event should ideally take place between one and three months before the wedding.

Plan the itinerary:

The bachelor or bachelorette party can be a chance for the bride or groom to bond with their closest friends before the wedding. Be sure to take their interests and hobbies into consideration when planning the itinerary. The celebration can be as simple as a pool party or a night of dancing, or it can be a full weekend of activities. Some popular themes include a western rodeo, Mamma Mia, Taylor Swift, or Barbie.

Send invitations:

Once the key details are finalised, send out official invitations (either virtual or hard copy) and confirm who will be attending. This will allow enough time to make travel-related bookings and finalise other logistics.

Purchase decorations and favours:

With the major details taken care of, the planner can focus on decorations, favours, games, and party swag. Matching t-shirts, decorative banners, customised drinkware, photo props, and hangover recovery kits are all popular ideas.

Confirm and share the itinerary:

About a month before the party, confirm the plans and share the itinerary with the guests. Provide important information such as the address of the hotel or rental home, transportation details, and any specific items guests need to pack. Creating a group chat can also be a fun way to keep everyone connected before the event.

In conclusion, while there is no official wedding party to take the lead, bachelor and bachelorette parties can still be planned with the help of close friends and family members. The key to a successful event is early planning, clear communication, and a focus on celebrating the bride or groom's interests and hobbies.

Wedding-day prep: Who helps the couple get ready?

The wedding day is a big event, and getting ready can be a fun and special time for the couple and their friends and family. Here are some tips and traditions to ensure the day gets off to a good start:

The night before

It is traditional for the couple to spend the night before the wedding apart, often staying separately with close family or friends. This custom is said to bring good luck, and many couples also enjoy the excitement of not seeing each other until the ceremony.

The morning of the wedding

On the morning of the wedding, the couple will usually be surrounded by their wedding party, which may include a maid of honour, best man, bridesmaids, and groomsmen. The wedding party can help with practical tasks, such as holding flowers and rings, and providing emotional support.

It is a good idea to give yourself plenty of time to get ready, with hair and makeup for the couple taking around 60-90 minutes each. The couple should wear comfortable clothes that are easy to take off without ruining their hair and makeup. They should also ensure their wedding outfit is hung up and ready to go.

The wedding party can also help with the following:

• Creating a timeline for the morning, working backwards from the time of the ceremony, and allowing time for hair and makeup, food, photos, etc.
• Providing food and drinks (perhaps mimosas or bellinis, but not too many!) for the couple and their guests.
• Ensuring there are enough power outlets for everyone to charge phones and run styling tools.
• Putting together an emergency kit for any last-minute mishaps, such as stains or hair and makeup touch-ups.
• Keeping the couple's phone relatively free from messages and questions by assigning someone else to take photos and handle any issues.
• Delegating tasks to ensure everything comes together, such as creating a playlist, setting up food and drinks, etc.

The couple should also be mindful not to overschedule the morning and to try to be present and enjoy the moment. It is also not recommended to try new beauty products on the day, in case of any unexpected reactions.

Other wedding prep

In the months leading up to the wedding, the couple may also be busy with other preparations, such as skin and beauty treatments, dress fittings, and planning the honeymoon. It is common to start a new retinoid for the skin around six months before the wedding and to book hair and makeup trials.

In the final weeks, it is best to avoid starting any new treatments or products, and instead, focus on hydration and calming the skin.

So, while there is a lot to think about when it comes to wedding prep, with a bit of planning, the couple can ensure they feel calm, confident, and ready to enjoy their special day.

Wedding photos: Who's in them if there's no wedding party?

There are many different ways to approach wedding photos, and the people included in them, if there is no wedding party, are entirely up to you and your partner. Here are some ideas for who to include in your wedding photos:

Classic Wedding Party Photo

The happy couple stands in the middle with their supporting crew on either side. This shot is posed against a beautiful background, such as your ceremony altar, stunning views, or trees.

The Triangle Pose

If your wedding party is an even number (not including the couple), the triangle pose is a great formation for your wedding pictures. This pose is most popular with the grooms' party, but it can also be done with the bridesmaids.

The Tunnel Photo

Line up the bridesmaids and groomsmen to form a tunnel, and position the couple jumping towards the back or running through the middle. This shot is usually taken during the grand exit or earlier in the night while jumping through the ceremony arbor.

The First Look

One of the hottest wedding trends is to do a first look with all of the key people in your wedding party: your parents, your bridal party, and maybe even your children.

Couple with the Entire Wedding Party

A photo with the couple and the entire wedding party is a great way to capture a special shot of everyone together. These groups are made up of all the people you love most, so you'll be glad to have a memento of everyone together.

The Overall Reception Design

Ask your photographer to capture scene-setting snapshots of the entire reception space, both with and without guests, so you can look back on every epic detail for years to come.

Candid Moments

Formal wedding photos are wonderful, but candid moments are also special. If you're open to having those natural, unposed moments captured, make sure your photographer knows.

The Couple

After you say "I do", sneak away with your photographer for some photos—just the two of you. It’s a nice moment to spend some time alone and a perfect time to capture amazing memories.

The Walk Down the Aisle

Whether you’re walking on the arm of your mother, father, or both, you’ll treasure this moment forever. Plus, it's the type of moment you'll otherwise never get to see without a photo!

The First Kiss

There's nothing like that first kiss as newlyweds. Be sure to have your officiant step out of the shot for this major moment.

The Cake

Make sure to get a shot of the cake before it gets cut into. Cutting the wedding cake is a rite of passage, so you'll definitely want this moment documented.

The Special Exit

Whether you're asking guests to toss flower petals or confetti, wave sparklers or ribbons, blow bubbles, ring bells, or any other creative idea, make sure that special exit is documented.

The Details

You've put a lot of effort into the details, so make sure your photographer captures them. This includes invitations, accessories, bouquets, and boutonnieres.

Family Photos

If you don't have a wedding party, you can still include your nearest and dearest in your photos. This could include parents, siblings, and children.

Friends

If you have a group of close friends, they can also be included in your wedding photos, whether this is in a more formal group shot or some fun, candid images.

Wedding toasts: Who gives them if there's no wedding party?

If you're choosing not to have a wedding party, you can still have toasts at your wedding. Here's a guide to help you decide who can give a speech and a toast.

Who Traditionally Gives a Wedding Toast?

The traditional wedding toast order is the father of the bride, groom, and the best man, followed by any other toasts. This is obviously for a heterosexual couple; but it's not set in stone. For all couples, including LGBTQ+ couples, you can mix speeches and toasts up however you like.

Here's who each person traditionally toasts:

• The father of the bride toasts his daughter and the new couple.
• The groom toasts his new spouse.
• The best man toasts the bridesmaids and the new couple.
• Other toasts may include the maid of honour toasting the groom.

Who Can Give a Toast If There's No Wedding Party?

If you're not having a wedding party, you can still ask your nearest and dearest to give a toast. Here are some ideas on who can give a wedding toast:

• The parents of the couple can give a speech and a toast.
• The couple can give a speech and a toast to thank their family and guests.
• A dear friend or a family member can give a reading or do a toast.
• You can ask a friend or a family member to be the 'master of ceremonies' and give a toast.

Tips for Wedding Toasts

• Give your speakers notice so they have enough time to prepare.
• Provide a time limit of around 3-5 minutes to share a story and a sweet sentiment.
• Let each person know when they'll be speaking so they can hold off on that extra glass of wine!
• Toasts should be short and sweet – a couple of sentences or 2-3 minutes long.
• The couple should not sip their drinks during the toasts as this will signal guests to do the same.
• The couple can then give a toast as a thank you to their guests, and to whoever was paying for the wedding.

Example Wedding Toasts

• "Here's to the bride and the bridegroom, we'll ask their success in our prayers, and through life's dark shadows and sunshine, may good luck be theirs."
• "May your love always be added. May it never be subtracted. May your household multiply and may your hearts never be divided!"
• "To the newlyweds, may I wish you health, happiness, and wealth – and everything else you could wish for."
• "May your joys be as deep as the ocean, and your troubles as light as its foam."
• "Here's to marriage, that happy estate that resembles a pair of scissors: 'So joined that they cannot be separated, often moving in opposite directions, yet punishing anyone who comes between them.'"

Frequently asked questions