Catholic Attending Jewish Wedding: Is It Okay?

A Catholic can attend a Jewish wedding, but it is not considered a sacrament by the Catholic Church. In the past, the idea of a Catholic marrying outside of their faith was practically unheard of, but today, in some parts of the US, up to 40% of Catholics are in ecumenical marriages with Christians of different affiliations or interfaith marriages with non-Christians. While the Catholic Church does not encourage interfaith marriages, it does support couples and helps them meet challenges with a spirit of holiness. A Catholic can attend a Jewish wedding, but they cannot officiate the ceremony.

Catholic belief states that a marriage between a Catholic and a Jew is not a sacrament

Catholic belief states that a marriage between a Catholic and a Jew (or someone from another non-Christian religion) is not a sacrament. This is because a sacrament is a sacred religious rite instituted by Christ, and marriage is in the nature of a contract. However, this does not mean that the Church questions that the couple is truly married as a civil matter, nor does it express any disrespect toward Judaism.

The technical term used in marriages with non-Christians is "the impediment of disparity of cult". If an interfaith couple wishes to have a wedding in a Catholic church, canon law prescribes that the local bishop must issue a "dispensation" on the basis of "just and reasonable cause", which is far more routine than in past times. Under church law, with a church wedding, the Catholic party takes a vow to avoid dangers that might lead them to leave the Catholic faith. They also "make a sincere promise to do all in their power to have all the children baptised and brought up in the Catholic Church".

The Jewish (or other non-Christian) party to the marriage is informed about the spouse's commitments "at an appropriate time". Prior to the 1983 canon law reforms, the pledge to raise children as Catholic was also required from the non-Christian spouse and was usually formalised in written form, which could cause hard feelings.

The Catholic Church does not encourage interfaith marriage

While the Catholic Church does not encourage interfaith marriage, it does not forbid it either. In the past, the idea of a Catholic marrying outside of their faith was practically unheard of, if not taboo, and such ceremonies never occurred in a church. Today, however, interfaith marriages have become more commonplace and socially acceptable, with up to 40% of Catholics in some parts of the US in "interfaith marriages" with non-Christians.

The Church does not encourage interfaith marriages due to the challenges that arise, but it does seek to support such couples and help them navigate these challenges. In the case of a Catholic-Jewish marriage, the Church does not consider it a "sacrament", but it does recognize the couple as validly married as a civil matter and expresses no disrespect towards Judaism.

For a Catholic-Jewish wedding to be held in a Catholic church, the local bishop must issue a "dispensation" on the basis of "just and reasonable cause". The Catholic party must vow to avoid dangers that might lead them to leave the Catholic faith and promise to do their best to have all children baptized and raised Catholic. The Jewish party is informed of these commitments at an appropriate time.

While the Catholic Church has become more lenient towards interfaith marriages, it is still a much bigger problem for the Jewish community. Rabbis in the Orthodox and Conservative branches are directed not to sanction or participate in interfaith weddings, and even the more liberal Reform branch often frowns upon them.

The Jewish faith forbids rabbis from sanctioning or participating in interfaith weddings

This prohibition is based on an unbroken tradition since biblical times, as noted in Deuteronomy 7:3-4. The Rabbinical Council of America, representing the Orthodox branch, declares that Jews in mixed marriages are "ineligible for Jewish communal leadership" and strongly condemns rabbis who officiate at mixed weddings.

The issue of interfaith marriage is a subject of intense debate in American Judaism, particularly in the context of ongoing assimilation and decline. According to a 2013 survey of American Jews, among those who married since 2000, 58% have a non-Jewish spouse, compared to just 17% for those married before 1970. This trend is expected to lead to most children in interfaith marriages not being raised Jewish, but rather becoming Christians or wholly secularized.

Despite these prohibitions, there are rabbis who are willing to perform interfaith marriages. For example, Rabbi Michal Woll, from the progressive Reconstructionist tradition, has never had a problem performing marriages between Jews and non-Jews. However, it is still unusual for a rabbi to share their life and the responsibilities of parenting with a non-Jewish spouse.

In the case of a Catholic-Jewish wedding, the Catholic Church requires that the local bishop issue a "dispensation" on the basis of "just and reasonable cause" for the wedding to take place in a Catholic church. The Catholic party must also vow to avoid dangers that might lead them to leave the Catholic faith and promise to do their best to have all children baptized and raised as Catholics. The Jewish spouse is informed of these commitments at an appropriate time.

While a Jewish rabbi cannot officiate at the actual marriage rite in a Catholic church, they can lead other parts of the service. With permission from the bishop, the wedding can also take place in a synagogue or a non-religious venue, which is called a "dispensation from canonical form".

The Catholic Church requires a Catholic wedding to observe canonical form

The Catholic Church has a pastoral concern for its members and their growth in holiness, which includes their sacramental life in the Church. The Church is involved in the preparation and celebration of the Sacrament of Holy Matrimony.

Canon 1059 points out that the marriage of Catholics, even if only one party is Catholic, is governed not only by divine law but also by canon law. For a Catholic wedding to be valid, the Church requires that the spouses are free to marry, that they freely exchange their consent, that they intend to marry for life and be faithful, and that their consent is given in the proper canonical form.

The canonical form of marriage is stated in Canon 1108 §1:

> Only those marriages are valid which are contracted in the presence of the local Ordinary or parish priest or of the priest or deacon delegated by either of them, who, in the presence of two witnesses, assists.

This means that a Catholic wedding must be officiated by a priest or deacon and witnessed by two others, using the Catholic form of marriage. The Catholic Church requires that a Catholic wedding observes this canonical form.

If a Catholic is not married in the presence of a priest or deacon and has not received a dispensation from canonical form, then the Church does not recognize the union as a valid marriage. A Catholic wedding is required to observe canonical form, so that the service occurs in a Catholic church (except for extraordinary circumstances) and is witnessed by a Catholic priest or deacon. A Jewish rabbi or other non-Catholic minister cannot officiate at the actual marriage rite but may lead other parts of the service.

In the case of a Catholic-Jewish wedding, if the bishop sees good reason, he can authorize the wedding to occur in the Jewish spouse's synagogue and be led by the rabbi, or even at a non-religious venue before a civil magistrate. This is called a "dispensation from canonical form". Importantly, church law forbids holding two separate weddings to get around interfaith complications.

Interfaith couples can receive guidance from Catholic parish priests or diocesan officials

• Marriage Preparation Programs: The Catholic Church offers various marriage preparation programs, such as Pre-Cana, Engaged Encounter, and mentor couple programs, where interfaith couples can receive guidance from priests, deacons, or trained married couples. These programs provide an opportunity for couples to explore their religious differences and resolve any potential conflicts.
• Diocesan and Parish Programs: Diocesan and parish programs are designed to support interfaith couples at a grassroots level. They can provide resources, offer counseling, and facilitate dialogue between couples to strengthen their marriages.
• Liturgical and Ritual Guidance: Catholic parish priests can guide interfaith couples in planning their wedding ceremony, ensuring it respects both religious traditions. This may include incorporating elements from both faiths, such as readings from Hebrew scriptures and the New Testament, signing an interfaith ketubah, or including cultural traditions like the chuppah.
• Child-Rearing and Religious Education: One of the most significant considerations for interfaith couples is how to raise their children. Catholic priests can provide guidance on fulfilling the Catholic spouse's pledge to raise their children in the Catholic faith while also honouring the non-Catholic spouse's religious traditions.
• Pastoral Care: Catholic parish priests and diocesan officials can offer ongoing pastoral care to interfaith couples, providing spiritual support and helping them navigate any challenges that may arise throughout their marriage.
• Community Support: Interfaith couples can find support and guidance from their local Catholic community, including fellow parishioners and faith-based organizations. This can include participation in prayer groups, marriage enrichment programs, and other community initiatives.

By seeking guidance from Catholic parish priests and diocesan officials, interfaith couples can receive the support and resources they need to build strong, respectful, and fulfilling marriages while navigating the complexities of their religious differences.

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