Bridal Shower Timing: Before Or After The Wedding?

Bridal showers are traditionally held before the wedding, but there is no rule saying they can't be held after. In fact, bridal showers used to take place after the wedding ceremony. Nowadays, they are typically held a few weeks to a few months before the wedding. This gives the couple enough time to set up their wedding registry and provides guests with time to purchase gifts. It is also a great opportunity for family and friends from both sides to meet and get to know one another before the big day.

Who hosts the bridal shower?

The bridal shower is usually hosted by the maid of honour, along with the bridesmaids, and sometimes the mother of the bride, although this is considered poor etiquette as it appears the family is asking for gifts. However, this tradition has evolved, and it is now common and acceptable for anyone close to the bride to host the bridal shower. The host is usually responsible for most of the costs.

If the bridal party includes a maid of honour, she will usually kickstart the planning process, from choosing a venue to sending out invitations. The bridesmaids may also choose to work as a team to host the bridal shower, splitting tasks and expenses.

If the bridal party does not include a maid of honour, or if the maid of honour is unable to host, the bride's family friends might volunteer to host. This is usually friends of the bride's parents who may have more established incomes, so hosting will be less of a financial burden.

If the bride and future spouse have different hometowns, friends of the in-laws might throw a bridal shower in the in-laws' city. This is a nice way for the in-laws' friends to welcome the bride into their crew.

If family members are not available to plan the bridal shower, the bridesmaids should step in to take care of the arrangements.

Who pays for a bridal shower?

While the host of the bridal shower usually pays for it, it's becoming more common for the costs to be shared between the host, the bridal party, the mother-of-the-bride, and even the bride.

The host is typically the maid of honour, but sometimes the couple's relatives, friends, or the couple themselves cover the cost. If the host is unable to finance the entire event, they can ask other members of the bridal party, the bride's mother, aunt(s), relatives, and wedding party members to contribute.

The total cost of a bridal shower can range from a few hundred dollars to thousands, depending on the number of guests and the venue. The budget should factor in food, drinks, venue, decorations, and entertainment.

When should the bridal shower be?

Bridal showers are traditionally held a few weeks or months before the wedding. However, there is no set rule on when it has to happen, and it is becoming more common for bridal showers to take place after the wedding ceremony.

When deciding on a date, it is important to consider the bride's preferences, the availability of the venue, and the schedules of the bridal party and guests. It is also a good idea to avoid planning the bridal shower too close to other pre-wedding events such as the engagement party, wedding outfit fittings, and the bachelorette party.

Starting the planning process at least six months before the wedding is recommended, and invitations should ideally be sent out four to six weeks in advance. This will give guests enough time to clear their schedules, purchase gifts, and make travel arrangements if necessary.

Ultimately, the timing of the bridal shower should be chosen to accommodate the bride, the bridal party, and as many guests as possible.

Where can the bridal shower be held?

While there is no set rule on where to host a bridal shower, there are a few factors to consider when choosing a location.

The first is the number of guests. You'll need to choose a location that can accommodate your guest list comfortably. The second is the budget. If you're working with a small budget, hosting the bridal shower at a friend or family member's home is a great option. If budget isn't an issue, you can consider renting a venue such as a restaurant, a private banquet room, an art gallery, or a spa.

The location should also be convenient for the bride and most of the guests. If the bride lives far away from her hometown, it may be more convenient for her to travel to the shower if most of the guests live locally.

When choosing a location, it's also important to keep in mind the theme of the bridal shower. If the bride is interested in art, for example, an art gallery could be a unique and memorable location. If she's a wine lover, a winery or wine bar could be a great option.

• A friend or family member's home or backyard
• A local restaurant
• A banquet hall
• An art gallery
• A spa
• A winery or wine bar
• A hotel
• An Airbnb
• A cooking school
• A wine-tasting room

Who's invited to the bridal shower?

Bridal showers are intimate, celebratory gatherings, and the guest list typically reflects a sense of closeness to the bride. Traditionally, the guest list includes the bride's close female friends and family members, like her bridesmaids, mother, sisters, and future in-laws. However, in recent years, bridal showers can also include close male friends or relatives if the bride wishes. Inviting people who are genuinely close to the bride and share a meaningful connection with her is what's most important.

It is considered proper etiquette for close relatives of the bride's spouse to attend the shower. This could include their mother, sisters, grandmothers, or another family member they are very close with. If the bride's future mother-in-law is hosting the bridal shower, expect even more in-laws to attend, such as aunts and cousins.

The number of guests invited to the bridal shower is ultimately decided by the bride, and the host (traditionally the maid of honour and/or bridal party) should consult with the bride-to-be about how many guests she feels comfortable having. It is also important to discuss venue constraints and any budget limitations that may impact the guest count.

It is essential to remember that everyone invited to the bridal shower should also be invited to the wedding. Inviting people to the bridal shower if they are not invited to the wedding is inappropriate and may offend them.

Bridal showers are typically more personal and smaller in scale than weddings, so it is okay to keep the guest list tight. However, it is important to create a well-rounded list that represents the bride's different social circles, such as family members, childhood and college friends, and coworkers.

Frequently asked questions