Big Weddings: A Fading Trend?

Big weddings have become increasingly elaborate and expensive over the years, with the average cost of a wedding in the United States reaching $27,000. However, there is a growing trend towards smaller, more intimate weddings and elopements. The COVID-19 pandemic restrictions have also caused a shift towards micro weddings and elopements, with some celebrants now specialising in these smaller ceremonies.

While large-scale weddings were once considered the norm, many couples are now opting for more affordable and meaningful celebrations. This shift may be due to a variety of factors, including the high cost of traditional weddings, the stress and anxiety associated with planning a large event, and a desire to prioritise experiences and adventure over a lavish, one-day celebration.

Some couples choose to elope to avoid family drama, while others want to reduce planning stress and create a more authentic and personalised experience. The high cost of traditional weddings can also be a burden, with some people going into debt to fund their dream wedding.

Ultimately, the decision to have a big wedding or a smaller, more intimate celebration is a personal one. However, it appears that the trend towards smaller weddings and elopements may be here to stay.

Smaller weddings are less stressful to plan

A smaller wedding can help alleviate some of this financial pressure. With a smaller guest list, you can choose a more intimate venue, which often means a lower cost. You may also be able to spend less on food and drink, and you might not need to worry about things like transportation and accommodation for guests. This can take a lot of the stress out of planning your wedding.

Another advantage of a smaller wedding is that it can be more personal and meaningful. With a smaller guest list, you can focus on the people who are truly important to you and your partner. This can make the day feel more special and intimate. It can also be easier to plan a smaller wedding because there are fewer people's schedules to coordinate and fewer opinions to consider.

Additionally, smaller weddings can be more environmentally friendly. Larger weddings often result in a lot of waste, from food to decorations. A smaller wedding can help reduce your carbon footprint and minimize the impact on the environment.

Finally, smaller weddings can allow you to spend more time with your guests. With a large wedding, it can be challenging to spend quality time with each guest. A smaller wedding gives you the opportunity to connect with your guests and create lasting memories.

In conclusion, smaller weddings can be less stressful to plan due to their reduced financial burden, increased intimacy, ease of planning, environmental benefits, and opportunity for deeper connections with guests. So if you're feeling overwhelmed by the idea of planning a large wedding, consider scaling it down and enjoying a more intimate celebration with your closest loved ones.

Big weddings are a recent phenomenon

Today, big weddings are often associated with different cultures, such as Indian weddings, which are known for their opulence and extravagance. These weddings are not just about conspicuous consumption but also a show of strength, a return to tradition, and a celebration of social conservatism. They involve a fusion of Western and Indian elements, with traditional ceremonies like dholki and Westernised events like cocktail parties and bachelorette parties. The elite Indian weddings can be seen as a phenomenon, with a lot of effort and money put into creating an experience.

The rise of social media and the influence of reality TV shows have also contributed to the expectation of big weddings. People are exposed to curated images of lavish weddings on platforms like Pinterest and Instagram, creating a sense of competition and keeping up with the Joneses. Additionally, the wedding industry has capitalised on people's desires, marketing expensive and single-use items as necessities.

While big weddings have become more common in recent times, it's important to note that they are not accessible to everyone and can create financial strain. Many people work multiple jobs or go into debt to afford a big wedding. Ultimately, whether someone chooses to have a big wedding or a small, intimate gathering, the most important aspect is the love and commitment between the couple.

Elopements are rising in popularity

Elopements are a far cry from the big, traditional weddings that have been popular for decades. Previously, eloping was often seen as a negative thing, a sign that the couple's marriage wasn't supported by their families. Now, however, it is increasingly viewed as a choice to focus the wedding entirely on the couple themselves.

Elopements are also a more affordable option. Traditional weddings are expensive, with high costs for venues, decorators, bakers, and entertainment. In comparison, elopements are much cheaper, with the main costs being the outfits, an officiant, hair and makeup, and a photographer.

The pressure to have the 'perfect wedding' is also a factor in the rise of elopements. Social media has made weddings much more visible, and many couples feel the need to keep up with the lavish weddings they see online. Elopements take the pressure off and allow couples to focus on their love for each other, rather than external expectations.

For some couples, elopements are also a way to avoid the traditions of a traditional wedding. Not everyone wants a long ceremony, a room full of people they don't know, or a bouquet toss. When you elope, you can choose which traditions to keep and which to discard, making the day truly your own.

Finally, elopements offer a chance to do something unique and creative. Whether it's getting married in a hot air balloon, on top of a mountain, or in a remote location, eloping gives couples the freedom to make their wedding day a special and memorable adventure.

While big weddings will always have their place, it's clear that elopements are becoming an increasingly popular alternative for modern couples.

Wedding costs have increased dramatically

The cost of weddings has risen sharply in recent years, with the average wedding in the US costing $35,000 in 2023, a $5,000 increase from 2022. This is a dramatic rise from the average cost of $20,300 in 2020. The COVID-19 pandemic and the subsequent economic downturn caused a dip in the average cost of weddings in 2020, but the cost has been on an upward trajectory since then.

There are several factors contributing to this increase. Firstly, inflation has played a significant role, with the rising cost of goods and services affecting the wedding industry. The cost of basic needs for the average US household increased by 8.5% in 2021, and this has had a ripple effect on wedding expenses. The cost of catering, for example, has risen due to increases in food costs.

The demand for weddings has also increased, creating a boom in the industry. There is a shortage of nearly everything needed to create weddings, from venues to staff, and this has driven up prices. Wedding vendors are facing longer hours, more work, price increases from suppliers, and staffing shortages, all of which contribute to the rising costs.

The cost of a wedding also depends on various factors, including the number of guests, the number of vendors hired, the style of the wedding, and the location. Destination weddings, for example, tend to be more expensive than hometown weddings due to the cost of travel and accommodations.

The pressure to have a lavish and extravagant wedding has also increased due to social media, peer pressure, and marketing by the wedding industry. This has created a perception that a wedding should be a grand and expensive event, with multiple pre-wedding celebrations and an elaborate ceremony.

The rise in costs has led to financial strain for many couples, with some even going into debt to afford their dream wedding. It is important for couples to prioritize their spending, create a realistic budget, and be flexible in their planning to manage the increased costs.

Historical Perspective

It is worth noting that the concept of lavish weddings is not new. Upper-class couples in the 1820s and 1830s had weddings similar to what is considered common today. However, the definition of "elaborate" at that time included owning your wedding dress, having a floral arrangement, and a wedding cake.

In more recent decades, weddings have become increasingly production-like, with reality TV shows, social media, and the wedding industry itself contributing to the perception that a wedding should be a grand and expensive event.

The wedding industry has fuelled the shift

The wedding industry has been adept at exploiting people's desires to do whatever they think everyone else is doing. This is achieved through curated images on social media, often not even of real weddings, and by capitalising on the desire to keep up with the Joneses. The industry has created a sense of competition among couples, with many feeling pressured to host increasingly extravagant affairs to signal their social status or power.

The cost of weddings has skyrocketed due to the wedding industry's pricing strategies. Vendors are known to mark up prices by at least 50% when the word "wedding" is mentioned. Couples often find themselves paying a premium for goods and services simply because they are associated with weddings. This dynamic has contributed to a cycle of increasing costs, as couples try to keep up with the latest trends and expectations.

The wedding industry has also been successful in creating new sales opportunities and inventing traditions that did not exist before. For example, bachelor and bachelorette parties, bridesmaids' "proposal" boxes, and rehearsal dinners are all invented or exaggerated opportunities for couples to spend more money. The industry has been clever in presenting these new traditions as essential parts of the wedding experience, even though they are largely unnecessary and add significantly to the overall cost.

The influence of the wedding industry is evident in the increasing expectations and norms surrounding weddings. What was once a simple celebration has now become a production, with many couples feeling pressured to include numerous pre-wedding events, expensive attire, lavish venues, and extravagant decorations. The industry has been successful in convincing people that these elements are necessary for a "dream wedding", leading to increased spending and, in some cases, significant debt.

While some may argue that the shift towards big weddings is driven by cultural factors or personal preferences, it is clear that the wedding industry has played a significant role in fuelling this trend. Through marketing, social media influence, and pricing strategies, the industry has shaped expectations and norms, leading to increasingly lavish and expensive affairs.

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